


Until Death do us Part

by BoStarsky



Series: Assorted Kylux [26]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crylo Ren, Curses, Demon Hux, Demonic Possession, Demonic Sacrifice, Hurt/Comfort, IT'S NOT ALL DARK, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Prostitution, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Kylo's life really sucks, M/M, Mental Illness, Murder, Not from Kylo or Hux, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Religious Themes, Suicidal Ideation, many hugs, there's fluff too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-01-22 21:44:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 41,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18536077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BoStarsky/pseuds/BoStarsky
Summary: In response to a drunken dare Kylo has landed himself with an allegedly cursed box from Ebay that comes complete with a nice cuff and his very own demon intent to drive him mad and eventually into the grave. Why is it always him? As if his life doesn't suck bad enough already.





	1. Emotional Support Demon

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, so this was born out of an RP I did with a friend, she gets all the credit for plot and more than half the writing. There is a rape scene that I will mark with *** either end so it can be avoided for those that want to, I'll elaborate in the end notes.
> 
> Thank you to ArsTyrannus for the wonderful art. You can find her over on Tumblr
> 
> Enjoy!

  
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Kylo should know better by now, every time he gets drunk he ends up doing something stupid, his impulses fried by cheap booze and what little self preservation he has gone out the window once he's three drinks in. Five drinks in he'll agree to almost anything, he's done a lot of shit like that, including losing his virginity once upon a time, an event he's glad he can't remember in detail. Six drinks in it starts to look like a good idea and he can barely coordinate well enough to stand, but the guy who dared him is ever so helpful in finalizing his purchase on Ebay.

****

Now here he is three working days later, two drinks deep and the supposedly cursed puzzle box sitting on his coffee table that lists precariously to the right on a stack of books he paid way too much for. He downs another shot of vodka and sets to work, thinking nothing off it when the wobbly table tips over. He just pounds another shot and moves the box into his lap, fiddling with the puzzle until he gets mad and goes on the hunt for a hammer he's sure he has and smashes the damn thing to bits when he eventually finds it. Finally at the optimal number of six it seems like a good idea to slip on the loose cuff he finds in the splintered remains thinking at least he got a neat accessory out of it all. Shot number eight finally puts him out of his misery and leaves him sprawled on the floor oblivious to the metal around his wrist burning hot as it molds to his skin.

****

If he had been sober, he might have noticed the way the lights flickered overhead. He might have felt the unnatural breeze that coursed through the room, rusting loose papers and knocking small objects over. As the bracelet moulds to his skin, a shadow passes over his sprawled out form, the lights shuddering their last, and a faint laugh resounds in the darkness.

****

“Oh yes. This will do nicely.”

****

As quickly as they went off, the lights snap back on with a harsh electric buzz and the room returns to normal. The shattered pieces of the puzzle box are no longer there, instead a little pile of ash and the not unpleasant scent of burning wood lies in their wake.

****

\--

****

Kylo wakes with his heart pounding, screams echoing in his head, the ghostly feel of demonic hands pulling him in all directions until his skin tore fresh in his aching mind. He welcomes the pain because it's something real, something to anchor him in the dull emptiness that his life has become. The floor is hard on his back, rough carpet rubbing his skin raw, he's not sure he could move even if the building was burning down around him, but his stomach forces him to at least roll over so he won't choke on his own sick, the carpet can handle another stain, not like anyone would know the difference, or smell it. It's difficult to believe this rat trap of an apartment was once new when it feels like it was built with all its water damage, mould, and mysterious stains included. At least the rent is cheap. his brief respite doesn't last long, stomach clenching painfully as it forces out the last dregs. He should have stayed on his back and choked.

****

His dreams becoming very much reality, he experiences the feeling of hands twisting in his hair while he retches, nails trailing harshly down his scalp, down his back, hard enough to draw blood. There isn’t anyone there, when he checks.

****

The apartment is in appalling condition already, but a patch of black mould near the tiny kitchenette appears to have grown considerably overnight. It was now threatening to take over the adjacent walls as well, spilling down with vein-like patterns.

****

In the attached bathroom, the faint sound of dripping water could be heard, as if someone had already run a bath and had not quite tightened up the taps enough.

****

He's still drunk, that's all, at least that's what he tries to tell himself as he sobs weakly, but the splitting pain in his head suggests otherwise. He should get drunk then, maybe he can numb out his mind again. The bottle of vodka sits by the couch, barely enough left to rinse the taste from his mouth, it burns on the way down. It's the need to feel numb that forces him to move, crawling to his fridge to look for more but finding it empty apart from a stray cockroach, he'll have to go out then.

****

He can do this, he reassures himself as he staggers to his feet, he can be sober for a few hours, pretend to be normal like everyone else. Rinsing the worst of the stink off in his shower that never seems to have warm water makes him feel marginally better, good enough to notice the cuff around his wrist and remember where he got it. He seems to remember it being bigger. It doesn't budge at the half hearted tug he gives it so he leaves it be, pulling on whatever clothes he can find that should pass for slightly better than naked.

****

It’s not long before the voice that had spoken last night makes itself known again, purring right beside Kylo’s ear. “You’re a bit fucked up already, aren’t you?” A heavy weight settles over his shoulders, the sensation of arms draped around his neck. “I do like a challenge.”

****

"Shit!" Kylo startles, tripping over a crack in the pavement as he spins to look behind him, hands reaching up to brush at the weight on his shoulders. It's nothing he tells himself, just a snippet of passing conversation. He'll stop shaking once he's had some food, he's sure of it.

****

Kylo’s shadow changes shape as he walks along, growing thinner, fingers elongated, strikingly similar to the things in his dreams. It moves like him, still in the correct place along the side of the building but it simply looks  _ wrong _ . The weight has gone from his shoulders now at least, but a presence remains at his side.

****

“So what’s for breakfast then?” Came the accented voice, softer and still without source. There was no one else around who could possibly be speaking to him.

****

"Whatever I can get for uh, two dollars and twenty three cents?" Kylo decides to indulge his madness and answer, staring at his shadow that appears so wrong. He'll have to score some money soon or he'll starve, question is how, maybe he could sell a few of his pills? No, they're the only things that keep him relatively sane. He could always just sell himself again, getting on his knees for a stranger is an easy way to earn twenty bucks, but at the moment he'd really rather not. The shelter it is then. He's been trying to stay away from them, not wanting any of the good samaritans that volunteer to take pity on him. He doesn't want their pity.

****

Not to mention the risk of running into Luke.

****

“Not a great deal, I’d imagine.” His shadow seems to stare back at him.

****

“I find murder is always a good option,” the voice intones smoothly. “Can’t pity you if they’re dead,” it’s laughing now and the bracelet seems to get warmer on his wrist.

****

“I’ll even help you.. if you ask nicely.”

****

If he hadn't clearly remembered taking his meds today he'd be sure that's what's causing all this. "Shut up," he snaps, a woman staring strangely at him as she skitters past. He's no murderer. "I'd rather suck cock," he tells the voice.

****

“Tsk. What a disappointment.”  The voice is filled with displeasure. The cuff is still growing hotter and fingers slide through his own, as if he were holding someone’s hand, walking with a friend to breakfast. “I can see how close you are to falling apart. It wouldn’t take much to make you snap would it.” It states matter of factly, fingers squeezing. “What have you got to lose,exactly? Certainly not your dignity.”

****

"Humanity, I guess." What little he has left, outside of the shelters most people would consider him less than human simply because he struggles with his own mind. 

****

The heat around his wrist is near unbearable, like putting your hand on a hot stove and not being able to take it away, he clenches the hand he's not sure is there, searching for some measure of comfort. Even if it is imaginary.

****

"Who are you?" he asks, "New imaginary friend?" He hasn't had one of those since he was six.

****

He really hadn’t put two and two together yet had he. Of all the people to end up with the cuff, this one was definitely the most frustrating. He should’ve been a quivering mess after the nightmares, he should’ve been jumping at his shadow. Hell he should’ve at least considered taking a life- the others certainly had.

****

“I’m not imaginary,” the tone was laced with irritation at Kylo’s inability to behave like a normal person. “And certainly not your friend.”

****

"Shame, I could use one," one that doesn't abuse his pliability when drunk or high, he's been through that more times than he'd like to admit.

****

The Burger King closest to his building is shady at best, but it's the only place he can get something greasy and semi filling for what little money he has. "Hope you don't expect me to pay for you." People stare at him, but surely they've seen worse come through those doors. At least no one throws him out, letting him step up to the register and spend all he has on a decent meal that will have to last him until tomorrow and slinking back out onto the street.

****

“I am getting absolutely nowhere with this approach,” a sharp sigh resounded and the cuff on Kylo’s wrist burned red hot for just a moment. Like a drop of ink falling into water, shadow bloomed beside him, bleeding out from the ornate piece of jewellery.

****

It took a very human shape, far more slender and a couple inches shorter than its wearer. Colour appeared next, tracing out sharp cheekbones and fiery hair. Gold eyes tinged with red glowered at the mess of a man and pale lips were pulled downward in a frown.

****

The apparition was dressed in a black suit, sleek and creaseless, the polar opposite to his companion. Apart from the pallor of his skin and the way it looked as if the tips of his fingers had been dipped in an inkwell, he could’ve passed for human.

****

Except no one else seems to notice him

****

Kylo turns pale at the sight of the man blurring into existence, this is hands down the worst hallucination he's had yet. "What the fuck," he whispers, burger frozen half way to his mouth where he's stood on the sidewalk. Hastily he closes his eyes and turns away, "It's just my imagination," he repeats it a few times before daring to glance over his shoulder and finding the man still standing there. Well, fuck.

****

"At least you're hot," Kylo concedes at last cramming a bite of the burger into his mouth in the vague hope that maybe he's just malnourished and dehydrated and this hallucination will go away once he's eaten something.

****

“Oh please, don’t flatter yourself.” He’s walking alongside Kylo, keeping pace and rolls his eyes at the repeated mantra. As if a mind so sunken into the depths of despair and self loathing could project something like him. Absurd.

****

“I can’t believe you haven’t put two and two together yet.“ A hand shoots out and curls around the wrist bearing the cuff. When his fingers make contact it feels very much real and he yanks the offending wrist towards himself. “Package deal.” He points at the bracelet. Honestly, it was infuriating being treated like this. He didn’t even seem particularly  _ afraid _ of him. Where was the begging and the shaky knees, the slow breakdown of the psyche?

****

Instead he got a mumbled ‘ _ At least you’re hot. _ ’ Really? This was just embarrassing for all parties.

****

“Hot?” The apparition’s face dropped as if Kylo were his student and he kept missing the point of the lecture. “Your priorities are completely misaligned.”

****

"Listen, my brain is barely limping along as it is, and yeah, I probably should be scared of you, but I've hallucinated worse and right now I'm hungover and feeling like I've been trampled by the morning rush at Grand Central so if you really did come out of that stupid box can you at least wait until I've finished my food before scaring me shitless?" Trying his best to ignore the way the cuff burns hot enough that he's sure the skin under is blistered. "Really, I'd rather be drunk and make this easy for you, but I'm broke so if I can't get some change by begging I'm going to sit down and open my mouth for whoever wants it. Then I can get drunk and you can do your thing." He really shouldn't be indulging his mind like this. What he should be doing is ignoring the possibly a demon he has following him around until he either blends in with the rest of the shit or disappears.

****

The expression that crossed his face was incredulous. Of all the insolent- Hux smoothed his features back into a mask of calm and then sighed. “Oh it figures I’d end up stuck with such a wretch this time. I was having such a good run.” He ran inky fingers through his hair, pushing strands out of place.

****

“I’m already completely off schedule.” He tapped his fingers against his lower lip in thought and then grimaced at  _ ‘open my mouth for whoever wants it’ _ . His job had gotten harder and harder as time went on. What the hell had happened to humanity?

****

“And just what do your think  _ ‘my thing’ _ is, hm?”

****

"I don't know, man, bleeding walls? Creepy shadows? And yeah, my back is sore, so thanks for that,"  he supposes he can blame the scratches on his back on this man, thought it is possible he fucked someone and just doesn't remember. Even if that's the case it feels better to blame something he can see. In the end it’s all his own damn fault anyway for spending his rent money on a cursed box and ending up with this.

****

“Well the slow creep of madness leading to the wearers eventual death has a better ring to it but sure. Bonus points for everyone you take with you- though I think you made it clear that’s off the table,” he huffs and paces in a circle around Kylo. “I guess drinking yourself to death is unlikely what with your lack of funds.” As they walk he seems to go straight through the people that pass by, but felt very solid to Ren. If he picked up on this detail it would only serve to reinforce the hallucination angle.

****

“You’re welcome. Does it hurt enough to make you want to step in front of that bus? No?” 

****

Clearly whatever this thing is it wants to get rid of him.

****

"Believe me, I want to do the conga in the middle of the road every damn day, but if I did I'd probably end up a ghost and be stuck in this shit hole anyway," It would be just his luck. And on the off chance he'd survive that they'd alert his family and that's the last thing he wants, to hear that simpering "Oh, Ben," as if they actually give a shit if he kills himself. They didn't give a shit about him before so why should that change just because he's even more miserable now?

****

Burger done away with he feels better by a slim margin, turning into the nearby park to slump down on the questionable grass in the hopes that he'll look pathetic enough for someone to give him a dollar.

****

His unwanted companion folds his legs and gracefully takes a seat beside him, gazing at him with enough intensity to bore holes through his head.

****

“I can guarantee that won’t happen.” he states matter of factly. “Honestly your life seems so shit I’m not sure what else I can do to make you wish it were over, but until you shuffle off this mortal coil I am stuck with you.” The bracelet goes white hot, mirroring his annoyance “So I’m damn well going to find out. I don’t think I can tolerate all of  _ this _ for much longer.” He gestures vaguely at Kylo’s unkempt appearance and pathetic expression.

****

"Me neither," Kylo hisses, rubbing at his wrist. "The fact that you're hot is your only redeemable quality so far and that's only because i'm hallucinating you." he puts down the empty carton his burger came in, tucking his knees up under his chin in an effort to ward off the cold breeze, if he gets sick now he'll likely starve, no one wants to fuck a snotty whore.

****

“Oh now I’m offended,” he snaps, prodding Kylo hard in the ribs, the sensation very real. “You’re not hallucinating. How are you this thick.” He picks up Kylo’s wrist and shoves it in front of his face. “Have you never heard of a cursed object?” They’d already been over this once.

****

“And why are you sat out here shivering anyway, what happened to that dingy flat?”

****

"If curses are real I'm pretty fucking cursed already, don't you think?" He yanks his wrist back down, trying his best to not enjoy the warmth radiating out from the demons touch. "And I'm out here because my apartment stinks and I need money for food, pills, and booze." He'll have to make an attempt at cleaning up his mess when he does get home, it'll still smell, but it's a roof over his head and walls to keep the wind out, one step up from a cardboard box.

****

"Do you have a name at least?" Someone jogging past looks disdainfully at him, he can't blame them when he's sitting here talking to himself, looking like an emo high school reject.

****

“Tell you mine if you tell me yours,” Hux scowls as Kylo yanks his wrist away. This was probably the most non-violent contact let alone conversation he’d had with someone mortal in .. well.. he’d never had a chat with any of his victims before.

****

“Maybe I’m the one whose cursed. Certainly feels that way. Anyone else would be a dribbling mess.” For a moment it almost sounds like he’s impressed. But the sight of the ruined man before him is anything but impressive.

****

"Kylo." Maybe he's not a hallucination after all, if he was he'd know Kylo's name already. "Aren't you a curse in itself though seeing as you came advertised as one, or are you just some poor fool who got the shit end of the stick, namely me. I don't blame you, I wouldn't want to hang out with me either." A lady drops a few coins in the little box, smiling hesitantly and scurrying away before he has the chance to utter a thank you.

****

“Hux,” he provides, unsure why he’s even bothering. “It’s a little of both really,” he supposes explaining things further couldn’t hurt.

****

“The cuff, well, I’m tethered to it,” he didn’t go into detail as to the story behind that particular arrangement. “Some poor soul finds it, puts it on, I drive them mad, they off themselves, rinse, repeat. I have something of a quota to fill.”

****

He glances up at the woman as she runs off, disturbed by the one sided conversation.

****

“But you, well.. you’re a problem.”

****

"Tell me something I don't know." He's always been a damn problem, a mistake to save a marriage that was doomed to fail and take him down in the crossfire. "And I'm already mad, but I'm too depressed to do anything about it. If I wasn't I'd make this easy on you." He'd gladly go jump off the Brooklyn bridge or take a swan dive from the roof of his building if he could be bothered to walk all the way there, as it is he can barely find the energy to sit here and shiver.

****

“Hm. Maybe I could help you then..” his words were not entirely clear and he stood, walking towards a rather well dressed businessman who was crossing their path in quite a hurry. Hux matched his stride, completely unseen, and leaned in as if murmuring something in his ear.

****

The man’s face went slack as he approached Kylo and he bent down, adding several bills from his wallet to the small collection of coins the woman had given. The man carried on walking, oblivious that he had done anything at all.

****

Hux looked to Kylo and raised a brow. “Not a bad start, no? You didn’t even have to debase yourself.”

****

Kylo gapes at the demon, glancing at the money, there's at least fifty bucks in there, that's enough for him to eat for a week if he's careful with his money, if Hux does that a few more times he'll be able to pay his rent too and all of it without bending over for some dirty stranger and risking every STD under the sun just so he can eat for another day. "So you're helping me now so I'll go kill myself?"

****

“Well. I suppose you have to go up before you can fall,” he hums, staring out at the people walking in the area. None of them were close enough yet.

****

“You could make my job easier and try to look a little more approachable.” He said little else as to why, not exactly wanting to reveal the short leash he was on.

****

"And do what? Take my shirt of?" Genetics are the only good thing he has, even as underweight as he is he still looks imposing enough to ward off most muggers if he stands up straight and squares his shoulders. Looking approachable isn't something he's good at, depression leaving him always looking tired and somewhat sour faced.

****

Hux sighs and kneels in front of him.  “Is that your go to solution for everything?” He reaches up and smooths Kylo’s hair back from his face. “Maybe try a different expression? You’re quite.. pretty in a way. Kicked puppy usually works. Put those big, brown eyes to good use,” he quips and stands back, then turns to wait for their next victim.

****

It isn’t long before a woman comes past walking her dog and comes just close enough for Hux to intervene. The dog is having none of it and seems agitated, snapping at his legs though the owner can’t see him.

****

He perseveres and she drops a handful of wadded up fives into the box, then trots away. On Kylo’s wrist, the bracelet has cooled considerably and seems to be growing colder with each new addition to his funds.

****

After the sixth person, Hux sinks down  beside Kylo and leans heavily against him.

****

By the looks of it he might have exhausted a demon and Kylo's not sure if that should be an achievement or not, then again, he now has a decent stack of money to show for it. All together it ought to be enough to pay his rent and food for this month, depending on whether he decides to prioritize the booze he's craving. Maybe he should splurge and get a decent coat at the goodwill a couple of blocks over. For now though he thinks they ought to just sit here for a while so Hux can catch his breath. Demon or no, Hux is the only sentient creature that's bothered to have a conversation with him in what feels like an eternity and in a fucked up way he's grateful for it.

****

The weight on his shoulder lessens as Hux shifts, hauling himself back to his feet with a lazy stretch. “So, what’s next on the agenda?” He still sounds tired, but is evidently not one to idle for long.

****

"I could use a coat and some groceries, there's a Goodwill a couple of blocks over and a corner store on the way back." His kitchen isn't equipped to handle much but his rusty fridge ought to be able to keep something for a while and he can jam the freezer full of whatever's cheapest and thin it out to the last crumb. Maybe even some carpet cleaner in the hopes of taking some of the smell out with the sick.

****

“Right then, shall we?” He waits for Kylo to lead the way, following along behind. The pair arrive at the Goodwill and Hux crinkles his nose in distaste. Sticking close to his companion, he gives his opinion on various options until they find a decent looking black coat. When Kylo tries it on, he nods his approval, appraising the fit.

****

“Suits you. Black is definitely your colour,” Hux grins.

****

It's not perfect, a little tight in the shoulders and there's a hole in the sleeve, but he supposes it's about as good as it'll get in here. It's a hell of a lot better than freezing to death, that's for sure. Seeing some of the money go leaves him feeling anxious about having enough for rent, but the coat had been a necessity he couldn’t go without.

****

“Well then, let’s get some food in you.” Hux nods towards the door, again waiting for Kylo to take the lead. Together they head towards the corner store where he watches Kylo fill a basket with various items. His shadowy companion seemingly intrigued by his choices.

****

Truth be told he had not spent a great deal of time doing anything apart from driving humans to destruction. This was.. refreshing.

****

“Get whatever you want,” he murmurs close to Kylo’s ear. “I think I should be able to pull the cashier’s strings. She looks weak willed.”

****

"What? Really?" He's a little ashamed of how excited he sounds, he hasn't been able to splurge on food in months, having to suppress every craving for something non essential. 

****

Now eager to shop he plucks several necessities like good soap and conditioner from the shelves along with an array of snacks as well as brand name frozen foods, even a bottle of better wine to go with the cheap vodka he uses as a means to an end. In the canned food aisle he helps himself to a good amount of stuff he can stock up on should something go wrong later. Then the king of luxuries, good toilet paper, the kind that won't rub his ass raw every time he has to take a shit.

****

Hux actually perks up a little, stifling a laugh at Kylo’s reaction. This was the epitome of a kid in a candy shop. When the reaches the checkout he stands behind the cashier, arms draped over her shoulders, lips to her ear.

****

It’s not obvious what he’s saying, but after she rings everything up, she applies a massive discount and then keys in the managers override. The total leaves Kylo with some change and Hux looks incredibly pleased with himself. He wobbles visibly as they depart the corner store.

****

“You’re stronger than you look. I thought you bought more than you could carry.”

****

"I used to lift weights before everything went to shit." Back then he could look in the mirror and feel proud, now he's a shadow of that, most of his bulk eaten away with starvation leaving him looking shredded in a sickly way while what remains of his muscles melt away. Still, it'll be a pain to get all of this back up to his apartment despite of the brief spark of joy he's desperately clinging to as they walk back.

****

Stepping through the door Kylo nearly gags on the stench, resolving to do some cleaning before anything else while he still has the energy.

****

Hux looks around as they enter and cringes. “This looks worse in daylight.” He steps over piles of rubbish and seats himself on the sofa, sprawling out.

****

Gold-red eyes watch Kylo intently as he flits about, cleaning the small space. The cuff on his wrist goes cold, as if it had never burned him at all, and on the sofa, Hux’s eyes are closed, his hands folded on his chest.

****

After an hour he grows tired, the space hasn't improved much, but at least the sick and the worst of the smell is gone, and his kitchen counter looks a little less likely to give him the plague. Opening his fridge he nearly cries at how full it looks, sure the ancient thing hasn't been full since he moved in. He helps himself to the twix he bought, wanting to enjoy it now, scared that it'll be gone next time he looks. Scared that Hux tricked him.

****

The demon in question hasn't moved since he sat down, leaned back on the couch with his eyes closed he looks peaceful, and damnably more attractive. Kylo supposes that's a design to draw him in. Not wanting to disturb him and risk pissing him off Kylo sits on the floor instead, unwrapping his candy with reverence. At the first bite he does cry, he can't remember the last time he had a candy bar and it feels like winning the lotto.

****

Hux stirs at the sound of muffled sobs coming from his new charge, rising from the couch to investigate. An arm snakes it’s way over Kylo’s shoulder, plucking the second half of the twix from its wrapper. Hux turns it over, inspecting the confectionery.

****

“So I can barely get a rise out of you, but you’re sobbing over chocolate?” He returns the candy to Kylo’s hands and returns to his reclining position on the sofa. “I really must be losing my touch,” he hmphs, head tilted towards the figure sat on the floor. He had felt a pang of.. sympathy.. or perhaps just pity when he heard the sound.

****

“So you’re fed and watered, what else is on the list?” Straight back to business, Hux had to remind himself that he was here for a reason, he was working against a deadline and despite his wavering feelings on the matter he had a job to do.

****

Kylo just glares half heartedly knowing he hardly looks threatening with his wet face and ruddy cheeks. It's stupid crying over chocolate, but when you've been scraping by ever since failing college little things can easily tip you over. Cramming the rest of the twix into his mouth he slinks away to the sunken mattress in the corner that serves as his bed, crawling under the blankets so he can pretend to be alone while he cries.

****

The mattress shifts as a weight presses down behind him, and warmth curves around his back. There are no snide words this time, no threats, no pain. Hux closed his eyes, still exhausted from his earlier efforts. His arms sliding around Kylo’s midsection, holding tight him as sobs wrack his thin frame.

****

Kylo tries to pretend that the warmth enveloping him doesn't feel so damn good, like it's satisfying a craving he didn't know he had. The last time someone held him like this it had been a lot more painful and earned him fifty bucks, it's scary how used he's gotten to the bad things in life, how the only softness he had was his therapist that he had to stop seeing when he couldn't afford it anymore. Hux is, Hux is as much a gift as he is a curse, not making it easy for Kylo to forget his end goal in being here, for now though, he can. For the sake of letting himself be held he can forget for a while that this demon wants him dead.

****

When his ribs stop spasming and the trembling ceases, Hux pulls away, leaving him in peace to rest. He sits back down on the sofa, one of the few pieces of furniture in the tiny studio apartment.  Looking around to properly take in his surroundings, he sighs.

****

What he had done for the man was highly unorthodox. He was bound in such a way to the gold cuff that he should have only been able to interact with its wearer. The amount of influence he had exerted to sway those other souls into doing his bidding had all but wiped him out.

****

With no way to restore himself, he was unsure how long he could keep this up. Kylo might luck out and find himself in the possession of just a bracelet soon enough. Either way, one of them would perish.

****

"Thank you," Kylo whispers to the wall, unsure if he's heard or not. He feels awful, how shitty must his life be for a demon intending to drive him to suicide to take pity on him like this. It makes him wish he could give something in return. "Would killing rats count?" Hux had wanted him to kill before, Kylo doubts he could ever do it in cold blood, but putting out poison for the rats in the building might count.

****

“No,” his voice sounds from across the room. “Animals are different. Imagine if you tried to eat a photograph of chocolate. That about sums it up.” He tilts his head back onto the arm of the sofa.

****

“Innocents are best,” he continues, not caring if the conversation makes Kylo uncomfortable- he started it after all. “But I’m in no position to be choosy. If you’re offering.” He drums his fingers on one leg.

****

“Though I believe you didn’t want to lose your humanity or some such.” He gestures vaguely in the air with one hand.

****

"No point if it doesn't work, how about hospitals or nursery homes, I'm sure if we look around we'll find someone who's dying." What he's considering makes Kylo’s skin crawl, taking a life isn't something you do lightly. However if they come across someone on the brink of dying, someone who won't wake up anyway, how bad can it be?

****

“Perhaps,” comes the polished voice again, and Hux actually finds himself feeling a little guilty. “Let’s play it by ear, yes?” When he had decided to help this mess of a man rather than hurt him, he had decided not to push the matter any further. Whatever happened, happened.

****

“You look like you could do with a shower. And some sleep.” He intoned, peering over the sofa at the mound of blankets in the corner.

****

"That your way of telling me I smell?" Not that he needs anyone to tell him that, he hasn't had spare change for the laundromat in a few weeks. First thing tomorrow he decides, it would be nice to smell decent again and then they can go to the hospital and see if there's anything for Hux there, if he's lucky he could just wait a little and hope whoever they find kicks the bucket on their own.

****

“That’s as close as you’re getting to me pretending I care.” There’s no bite to his words though, and he rolls back onto the sofa, closing his eyes.

****

“Just wake me if anything important happens,” the demon murmurs softly. 

****

Chances are he's found a friend after all, Kylo smiles to himself, letting his eyes slip shut and sleep to whisk him away to blessed nothingness. 

****

When he drifts off, the dreams that come to Kylo are a whirlwind of images. A fiery figure featured heavily, though when it shouted abuse at him, calling him weak, pathetic, a disgrace, it called him Armitage. Lash after lash lanced across his back and the world was aflame.

****

In the small apartment the temperature had become unbearably hot, and on the sofa, Hux thrashed terribly as he slept, gripped in the throes of agony. His skin no longer appeared human, instead a patchwork of black char veined with glowing red cracks like flowing lava. He curled into himself as cold blue flame licked at the sofa around him.

****

Kylo wakes choking on a scream and drenched in sweat, everything feels like it's on fire, a burning set deep into his bones. He coughs, trying to dislodge the ash and bone dust clogging his throat, frantically stripping his shirt off in the hopes that it might cool him down, it doesn't, the oppressive heat clings like a wet blanket. It's first then he notices the unnatural blue light flickering up the walls, the source being flames that don't seem to burn yet still envelop everything in its path. "Hux!" he calls out to the demon thrashing about on the couch, his mind calling up hazy memories of the voice in his dreams. "Armitage?" he tries carefully.

****

The flames die out in an instant as if the oxygen had been sucked out of the room. Hux sat up with a gasp, his form entirely inhuman for a scant few seconds as he comes down from the terror that squeezed his heart. He whipped around, his face changing back to what Kylo knew in one smooth movement.

****

“How did-“ he started, frowning. “Where did you hear that name,” lips set in a thin line, he looks tired more than annoyed.

****

"A dream, I'm sorry," Kylo stutters, scooting back towards the wall, if he'd been in doubt of Hux's demonic nature before it's all gone now, burned up by the face that had just greeted him. Fear coils heavy around his heart and his breath lodges in his throat. "I'm sorry," he repeats when his back hits the wall and he has no means of escaping further.

****

Hux seems taken aback by Kylo's response. He hadn't actually set out to frighten him, and yet here he was backing away and staring at him like a cornered animal. This was what he wanted from the beginning, right? A little fear, a little reverence?

****

So why did it leave him feeling so.. hollow? Had he actually been enjoying the tenuous camaraderie they had built together?

****

"It's okay, it's okay, really," he tries to use a soothing tone which he's not even sure he's capable of but the effort is made. "That wasn't your dream," Hux frowned, rising from the miraculously unburnt sofa. He looked as human as he had before, though instead of the sharp suit he had arrived in, his attire resembled something soft and comfortable for sleeping.

****

"Interesting development though. I've never really spent any time speaking to anyone who was cursed with the bracelet, nor did they spend so long sane and well.. alive," he said the last word as gently as possible to avoid spooking Kylo even further. "I wonder if they experienced the same..."

****

When he finished speaking he had moved to sit on the edge of the mattress in the least threatening pose he could manage. "You can stop cowering. I'm not going to hurt you. Well not yet anyway," he laughed in a poor attempt at humor.

****

Now that he's seen what Hux really is trusting those silken words won't come easy, at this point he's not sure what to believe anymore. Maybe if he takes his pills Hux will reveal himself to have been a figment of his imagination, he knows that won't happen, but it's nice to dream. Instead he reaches for the cuff, tugging at it and trying to pry the metal away from his skin, it stays fast, not even budging. Fuck. Why does shit like this always happen to him? He could cut it off if he had the means, his sparse collection of dull knives won't do, he's no stranger to hurting himself, the scars littering his arms and legs evidence of that, but even he balks at the thought of cutting his own hand off.

****

"Please don't hurt me," he whimpers, memories not his own mingling with snippets of his mother's scathing comments every time he failed to live up to her expectations, his father’s indifference, and both their preference for Poe who used to be his best friend over their actual son.

****

Hux watches him try to remove the cuff, gaze flowing over an abundance of scars he had not noticed before. “I’m not going to hurt you,” he said, softer now, trying to inject some calm into the situation.

****

“I was only joking.” And badly at that. He felt a twinge of guilt for preying on the clearly vulnerable man’s emotions. Guilt that went directly against his priorities. He was conflicted.

****

“Besides, the wearer has to be the one to.. er.. do the deed. As it were. I can’t force you,”  _ I can only make you want to end it _ he finished in his thoughts, knowing that was the last thing Kylo needed to hear.

****

“I’m sorry I’ve scared you. You weren’t meant to see any of that. It’s my burden to bear.”

****

"I've wanted it to be over for a long time," Kylo whispers. He even tried once, couldn't do that right either, still that's how he ended up getting help until he could no longer afford it and had to start rationing his pills in weak doses to make them last longer before he's left on his own again. He's nearly out, just a few left rattling around in the little orange bottle every time he picks it up.

****

“Why?” Hux turned to stare at him, gold flecked eyes strangely warm. The question was a heavy one.

****

“Current living circumstances aside, things couldn’t have gotten this bad overnight,” he frowned, not understanding why anyone with any freedom over their own life, their own destiny, would willingly throw it away. Well unless his less than delicate coaxing was involved but that was another matter.

****

"I fucked up from day one, I was supposed to save their marriage. I didn't, just made it worse, and when I finally made a friend at school they liked him better. Always wrong, never good enough, couldn't keep a job, lost my scholarship because I got in too many fights. The only thing I've achieved and even that wasn't good enough." After that he stopped trying, a few months later he tried to stop it all. "I'm too unstable to work, nobody wants me around, not even me." It really would be the best for all involved if he did jump off the roof, one less problem in the world. "I'm so tired."

****

Hux listened quietly, trying to imagine what this broken man would've been like if things had gone differently for him. He was certain Kylo would've been a challenge for him whether he was complete or not. Maybe this was fate of a sort after all.

****

What Kylo said seemed to strike a chord with the quiet demon, and a note of sympathy bloomed in Hux’s chest. What he said next was.. hesitant.

****

"I can... ah.. I can relate." He was tired too, he had spent such a very long time with only the mad and the dead for company. "What you saw, in the dream, that was my father..." he trailed off, hoping this piece of information might somehow offer some comfort, a similar experience, to show Kylo was not alone in his suffering.

****

"Demons have parents?" He'd sort of assumed they just popped into existence, either way, if that had been Hux's father in the dream maybe they're not so different after all. A spot of common ground to stand on in this whole mess. "He sounded like a dick." Much worse than his own father, Han had never been cruel, but he hadn't made an effort either when Kylo showed little to no interest in what Han wanted him to do.

****

Laughing at Kylo’s apt observation Hux turns, pulling his legs onto the mattress so they’re completely facing each other now.

****

“You don’t know the half of it,” he wears a lopsided smile and nods to the cuff on Kylo’s wrist. “That was his doing as well.” Vibrant eyes narrow to glare at the offending object. “It’s supposed to ‘ _ toughen me up _ ’”

****

"I haven't met a lot of demons aside from my own, but you don't seem all that bad," Kylo smiles tentatively pulling his knees up under his chin and wrapping a blanket around his shoulders, feeling cold now that the sweat has dried and the heat is gone, leaving his apartment the same old drafty shit hole it always was. "What did you do to piss him off? All I did was exist and want to draw more than anything else." Art is apparently not good enough even if he got a scholarship for it.

****

“I believe that’s where the problem lay.” Rolling his eyes and very aware of the irony in his words, he moves to sit beside Kylo in an effort to lend some of his natural body heat. “You’d probably be warmer if you put your shirt back on you know.” Not really a complaint though.

****

“What did I do?” the demon humms, tapping his fingers restlessly on a bent knee. “Much like you, I was brought into existence. Unfortunately I wasn’t birthed by the correct demoness..” His eyes were downturned, the subject of his questionable parentage and his fathers dalliance was a sore one.

****

“You can draw?” he changes the subject, latching onto the lifeline Kylo has unintentionally thrown him. Better that then to try and explain a complex caste system and how he related to it.

****

"I guess." Not that he's bothered much since college went sideways, his imaginative landscapes and designs clearly weren't enough to make him worth the trouble. "And my shirt is disgusting," he sighs. There are a few more laying around though, not that any of them could be considered clean.

****

"I'm sorry your dad is such a dick." His knees are bony and uncomfortable as he buries his nose between them only to come back up pretty quick when he smells himself, thank God Hux helped him get some soap yesterday. Or thank Satan, he supposes.

****

Kylo was fairly closed off and Hux figured this was only fair. In the past twenty four hours he had been drunk, hungover, convinced he was hallucinating and then had a shocking nights sleep.

****

All things considered he was handling things pretty damned well. Hux was impressed.

****

“If not for him, you wouldn’t be stuck with me, so you’ve got even more reason to dislike him.” Watching Kylo fidget, Hux leans back against the wall and lets out a sigh. “Why don’t you go take a hot bath or something. Bring your body temperature up, use some of that prissy shampoo you bought. Dying of a cold doesn’t count.”

****

"Shame," Kylo snorts, but does as he's bid, awkwardly rising from the bed and stretching out the kinks as he makes for the dingy bathroom where the light habitually flickers out and the faucet never stops dripping. He still can't get the shower hotter than lukewarm though this time he doesn't care, it feels too damn good to watch the disgustingly grey water wash down the drain along with suds, the flowery scent of the soap filling the little room to combat the smell of mould and mildew. Finally having clean hair brightens the world significantly, it's still overgrown and tangled, in serious need of a cut, the ends split and frizzy, catching on his cheap comb.

****

While Kylo cleans himself up, Hux ghosts around the kitchen, peering in cupboards and drawers and generally feeling disappointed at what he finds. He boils some water, that was easy enough, and then found a box of tea that looked like it had been there long before Kylo’s tenancy started. Still, tea never really went bad, right? At least Kylo had been sensible enough to buy milk and sugar as well.

****

When Kylo eventually emerged from the tiny bathroom Hux was waiting for him with a steaming cup of tea. “The teabags looked to be older than me. This may or may not kill you,” he said, offering the mug.

****

"Not sure if I'd mind," Kylo mutters taking the chipped mug Hux is offering. Other than tasting a little stale the tea is alright, the milk and sugar doing a good job of covering it. Besides, he's had way worse in the name of survival, always being determined to go out by his own means and not something like starvation, he's even collected rainwater and eaten out of the trash behind restaurants when he's been desperate enough. It's not something he likes to remember.

****

"Oh stop being so dramatic," Hux rolls his eyes, watching him drink the tea, feeling a little pride that he's accepted it. It's odd but, helping actually feels... nice. "Do you feel better?" he asks, settling back down on the small sofa as if he lived there. "You certainly smell better."

****

"I guess, I don't feel worse, but that's hardly an achievement in my life." Digging into the fridge Kylo finds a yoghurt, wolfing it down as fast as he can. "I need to go to the laundromat," he states with false bravado, he hates going to the laundromat. It's a sad place full of people down on their luck and sitting there in his underwear while his clothes wash always leaves him feeling humiliated. Still, his clothes stink so he gathers up what he has, stuffing it into a plastic bag and pulls his new coat on.

****

"Well, I guess that will have to suffice." Hux nods, watching as Kylo flits around the apartment, gathering up clothes and stuffing them into a bag to be washed. When they leave, he follows, of course, sticking close like the shadow he never wanted.

****

When they arrive at the laundromat, Hux sinks himself into a chair to wait. The place, like everywhere else Kylo had taken him thus far, was dingy and in disrepair. He thought back to his tear stained face over the chocolate he had eaten the night before and wondered how the world could just let someone fall through the cracks like this.

****

He followed Kylo with his eyes, unspeaking, not wanting to draw him into a conversation that would make him look completely crazy to the other patrons. Hux looked up at the grainy CCTV screen above the small counter. Was that meant to deter people from what, stealing someone else’s underwear? He stared at the empty chair on the screen, the one that he occupied, and frowned. The camera's didn't pick him up either apart from a slight flicker like a magnetic disturbance on the screen.

****

Looking back at his hands, he waited and wondered if there were any other small improvements he could facilitate. The little spark of life Kylo had shown when he was able to let go in the corner shop had felt so  _ good _ . Hux was aching for another taste.

****

Since everything in his meager wardrobe is black Kylo stuffs it all into one machine, stripping down so he can get all of it in one go then putting his coat back on so the others won't be privy to his bony hips or start counting his ribs as a form of entertainment. Pouring in a modest amount of detergent and dropping a few coins in the slot he sinks into the chair next to Hux to wait the hour or so before he can put his stuff in the dryer. Sitting here like this with his bony knees and ankles on display has him feeling exposed and a little cold as he stares longingly at the coffee machine in the corner mentally counting what spare change he has and if he can splurge on some hot chocolate. Then again, what if he needs the money for something else?

****

Hux watches him intently, he swears he can count his ribs, and grimaces. Oh if his father could see him now, brought so low by this sad, broken waif of a man. He doubted he would survive to tell the tale anyway. As he settles back into the seat beside him, Hux can practically hear him thinking about a hot drink, the way he looks at the coffee machine as if it were the last glass of water in a scorching desert.

****

Hux leans in close and nudges Kylo's shoulder. "Just go get a drink, would you? You're making me thirsty the way you're staring at that thing."

****

"I should save my money, rent's due this week," Kylo tries to convince himself. It doesn't matter how much he wants it, he'd rather have a roof over his head.

****

"Oh for the love of-" Hux shoots up out of his seat, scowling. He marches over to the little desk, and fiddles with the register, quietly opening it while the owner sits on a chair, watching TV, completely oblivious.

****

There were some benefits to not being able to be seen. 

****

On the monitor above the desk, the register shifted, and a handful of change rose out of it of its own volition. The money drifted round to the other side of the counter and down to the other end of the laundromat where the coffee machine was plonked in a corner. Hux made it about three quarters of the way there, before he suddenly stopped. He turned around, looking absolutely humiliated, and marched back to Kylo. He pressed the change, the coins already warm, into his hands - it wasn't a lot- just enough to buy one or maybe two coffees.

****

"You do it," he muttered, looking a bit put out.

****

Kylo watches all this, stunned into silence and startled out of it when Hux shoves a few coins into his hands. "Do you want something?" he should ask, at least. It's hard not to feel conspicuous walking over to the coffee machine, no one seems to notice anything out of the ordinary and Kylo groans quietly at how sticky the floor by the machine is. Hot chocolate pouring he turns to look at Hux, raising a brow in question.

****

When he turns around, Hux is right at his heels, having followed behind him the whole way. Ever the diligent shadow.

****

"I can't," He frowns, kicking at a sticky patch on the floor. "It would serve no purpose." The spot of floor must have been  _ really _ interesting because it suddenly seemed to draw all of his focus. He wants to change the subject.

****

When the little paper cup was full he's granted his wish and pulls a face at it. "It looks like dirty water."

****

"Yeah, but I haven't had hot chocolate in ages either," gingerly picking the cup up Kylo brings it back to their seats, "I promise I won't cry at this." It's an empty promise really, but if this is going to make him cry it's more likely for being awful.

****

"Thank you," he smiles faintly at the demon, grateful that once again he could save money because of him. Rent is usually the worst time of month, his landlord refusing to take nothing so he'll take Kylo instead. He's always agreed because he'd rather suck a dick than be homeless and now he won't have to.

****

Following him back and sitting beside him, Hux smiles at his promise not to cry, taking it as an attempt to be lighthearted. Maybe he actually was on the mend, starting to feel a little more human. He had to laugh at the concept; cursed man's demon helps him feel more human. If he'd known what the landlord expected from Kylo, his smile would have faded, but he really only had a feel for the emotions the man was projecting and there was only a feeling of being grateful.

****

"No need to thank me," he nodded solemnly and then leaned back in the chair, looking away to watch whatever awful programme daytime television had to offer while they waited for Kylo's laundry to finish.

****

Putting on clothes that are still warm from the dryer is easily one of Kylo's favourite things in the world, how the soft warmth just wraps him up and chases away the cold for a while, not to mention that he has clean clothes now. It adds a flicker of brightness to his existence. "Do you want to go to the hospital and find someone," he offers haltingly as he stuffs his clean clothes back into the bag. Murder sounds no more appealing today, but Hux has been helping him and it's only right that he tries to repay the favour.

****

Happy. He's actually happy to see the way Kylo's face lights up when he's wearing warm and clean clothes. And he has to admit, as he leans in, that the smell of fragrant shampoo and clean laundry is alluring.

****

"Look at you," he smiles like a proud parent. "You clean up nicely. Might land yourself a girlfriend at this rate." Hux folds his arms over his chest, taking him in. When he mentions the hospital the warm moment shudders out and reality comes flying back into focus. "No. We don't have to do that. You don't have to do that."  He wasn't about to undo all of his hard work by sending Kylo into a downward spiral over killing someone.

****

Kylo falters a little at the girlfriend comment, are demons homophobic? Aren't gay people supposed to go to hell anyway? His attention quickly shifts when Hux turns down his offer, his gay angst can wait. "Don't you need me to, uh, you know?" Despite it all it's actually pretty nice to have a demon around to keep him company and help ward off the loneliness, he doesn't want to lose that so soon. Not when they've struck up some form of camaraderie, Hux is the closest thing to a friend he's had since Poe fucked him over.

****

"It's fine," Hux clips, not wanting to get further into it. He finds over the time they've spent together he's actually grown fond of Kylo. Having him take a life, something he is very clearly not okay with, would put Hux in the same category as those who would use the vulnerable man for a cheap thrill.

****

He was better than that, though it would cost him dearly in the end, he could be better than that. His mother would have been proud.

****

"Let's just take the rest of your clothes back to your flat and sort out your rent, okay?" He waits for Kylo to lead the way, as usual, and stares past him at the door.

****

Kylo sighs, giving up the fight for now and leading the way back home, climbing the three flights up to drop off his laundry and throw back a swallow of vodka to ready himself for dealing with his landlord.

****

Hux follows along in silence on the trip back to the flat, his thoughts elsewhere as they ascend the stairs so Kylo can deposit his clean washing and, wait was he drinking vodka? Before he could question what made Kylo think drinking so early in the day was a good idea.

****

Carefully counting the money while he ventures back down to the first floor where he knocks on the office door and waits nervously, staring at the half gone sticker that proclaims ‘ _ OFFI _ ’. After a lot of shuffling around the door opens to reveal a greasy looking man maintaining a slouching posture and a mean look in his eye. "What?" he snaps.

****

It all clicks into place for Hux when he catches sight of the landlord, food stains on his shirt, hair combed over an obvious bald spot and gelled into place, and apparently the source of strong vinegar smell that Hux had crinkled his nose at from the hall.

****

"Rent, it's all there," Kylo stutters, holding out the stack of bills and keeping his eyes on the floor.

****

Pleased that Kylo can pay his rent, Hux thinks that this encounter should be a breeze. Hand over the money and they can go back to trying to do a little more damage control, he’d planned to talk to Kylo about obtaining some more clothes that are less worn and ventilated.

****

"Get on your knees." Kylo’s landlord grabs the money and steps aside pointing at the floor just inside the office door before pulling his belt open.

****

"What, no! It's all there, I swear." Should he run? He could if he had somewhere to go. He paid the rent in full, he shouldn't have to do this, not this time.

****

"Get down." His landlord repeats. Not wanting to start a fight and risk getting evicted Kylo does as he's told, closing his eyes so he can pretend this isn't happening.

 

********* **

 

"What the  **fuck** are you doing?" Hux shouts, not at Kylo, but at the landlord who is oblivious. He swipes at the large man, wanting to close his hands around his throat, but connects with nothing. "Kylo. Kylo get up. Don't do this." He pleads, staring at the one person who can hear him but probably won't respond. "We can find you somewhere else. Please."

****

Kylo tries not to cry, but when Hux calls out to him so frantically the tears well up, he doesn't want the demon to see this. Looking at his landlord isn't an option so he closes his eyes and tries to block out everything while the man goes about his business. It hurts, his throat constricting painfully at the intrusion, forcing him to put his focus on not gagging just wanting it to be over as quick as possible.

****

Hux's eyes go wide as tears well up in Kylo's eyes and he doesn't rise to his feet. He can't watch this. He turns his back and feels bile rise in his throat, unable to block out the sound of the man violating Kylo behind him. "FUCK!" He screams, punching the wall in front of him, sending plaster chips cascading to the floor. Feeling utterly wretched that this, this of all things, is not something he can help with, he sinks to the floor, leaning against the doorframe, his back to the obscene assault taking place behind him. Wetness pricks at his eyes, and he too prays that it will end quickly.

****

Every time he's had to do this has been awful, no matter how much Kylo tries to block it out it's impossible to ignore the smell pushed into his nose or the hands fisted in his hair. He keeps his eyes closed as best he can until his landlord finishes, holding him in place and forcing him to swallow before kicking him out the door with little ceremony. The tears keep coming as he sits on the floor for a minute, forcing himself to get up and escape to the relative safety of his apartment where he can get blind drunk and try to forget about it all.

 

***

****

There's barely any comfort to be had in stumbling into the place he calls home. The vodka doesn't help much either though it burns the taste from his mouth and makes it easier to  ignore his roiling stomach as he downs swallow after swallow. ****  
** **

 

Hux sits with him silently on the floor outside, giving him space, not wanting to touch Kylo in case it only made things worse. He follows silently as they ascend to the small apartment, and watches him drown himself in vodka.

****

After what feels like hours he finally speaks.

****

"I'm sorry..."

****

"I'm sorry I couldn't..." He stares at Kylo, unable to find the words, the wretched feeling from earlier still not having left him. "He deserves to wear that." He gestured to the bracelet. Anger was simmering beneath the surface. How dare he. How dare that piece of trash force himself on the beautiful ruin of a man slowly getting drunk in front of him.

****

He wanted to make him pay. If anyone was deserving of a slow, suffering end, it was sat downstairs in a stained wifebeater with Kylo's saliva still on his cock.

****

The bracelet flared dangerously hot for a moment and Hux reigned himself in, not wanting to hurt Kylo any more than he already has been. He wants to.. well he wants to hold him in his arms. He wants to tell him it would be okay, he wants to wipe the tears away from his eyes.

****

Convinced that any form of physical contact would be unwise, considering what Kylo just went through, Hux instead lets his shoulders slump, wishing he could partake of some of that vodka as well.

****

Kylo drinks until spots dance in front of his eyes and he can barely form a coherent thought. The memory still lingers and he wishes he could scrub himself raw to get rid of it, cut out his tongue to erase the taste completely. He'll be fine, it's not like he hasn't done this before, he'll get over it and really he shouldn't complain since he still has a place to live. It's not that big of a price to pay. Still that deep need of wanting to go home lingers and he has to remind himself that he doesn't have one, he's not welcome there anymore, hasn't been for a long time. This is it for him, he's going to die in this shit hole one way or another and he's always known it.

****

It's first when he finally looks at Hux that the realization strikes him, he doesn't want to die anymore. A fucking curse meant to kill him has given him a will to live, however faint, the irony is almost too much. With the help of drunken bravado he crawls over to the demon wanting to be close to someone who isn't actively hurting him, feeling safe there against all reason.

****

Hux says nothing, watching Kylo drink himself into a stupor. No wonder why he was in such a state when they first met. If this was his life, it was understandable. He's sat on the mattress in the corner, with his back to the wall, in a similar pose to the one Kylo took earlier that morning watching Kylo’s slow approach, alcohol having dulled his senses, and shifts over to make room.

****

As Kylo climbs into the bed, Hux pulls him to his chest, holding him tightly. A hand gently strokes through his hair while another rubs slow circles into his back. His mother used to do this for him when he was young. Perhaps it could provide some comfort for Kylo too.

****

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." He murmurs into Kylo's hair, letting his eyes slide closed.

****

It's not long before the mix of alcohol and exhaustion pulls him under, he can only hope he won't remember much when he wakes up. It's futile and he knows it, but he can still hope that these last couple of hours have just been a nightmare he can put behind him when he wakes.

****

Hux stays awake, keeping a silent vigil as Kylo goes slack in his arms. He stays like that through the night, carding his fingers through his hair and providing a fragile sense of safety. When the sleeping figure seems to cry out in the grip of a nightmare, he soothes away the offending images, stroking inky fingers down his back. He can feel the notches that mark Kylos spine. He was so thin, so delicate.

****

The demon refuses to let go, allowing his charge to get comfortable, of course, but never did he break contact. Eventually when afternoon bled into night, night turned back to day and he watched through tired eyes as the first rays of sunlight crept through the opening in the curtains. Kylo’s eyes were still closed, he looked remarkably peaceful like this. Smoothing a hand along his upper arm, Hux pulls up the blankets that had slipped down, enveloping him in new warmth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a scene in which Kylo's landlord forces Kylo into oral sex, it's not particularly explicit. Other triggers are Vomiting, excessive drinking, mentioned prostitution, suicidal themes, past self harm, mental manipulation (of the demonic kind, not Kylo), mentioned intent to commit murder


	2. Well, Shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings in the end notes
> 
> Enjoy!

It feels like the entire building has collapsed on him when consciousness finds its way back, forcing him to leave the blissful ignorance of sleep and be met with a splitting headache and what feels like a dead rat in his mouth. He groans in complaint, squeezing his eyes shut and pressing his face into Hux's chest to ward of the light that's making his entire body throb in pain. "What if they really fucking deserve to die?" Kylo croaks, voice caching on the barbed wire in his throat.

****

He doesn't get the chance to wait for an answer before his stomach revolts the abuse, "Oh no," by sheer luck alone he makes it to the kitchen sink thereby avoiding another stain on the carpet.

****

Hux turns his head away as Kylo retches into the kitchen sink. He's honestly not sure what he even has left to throw up, having not seen him eat much of anything in the past day.

****

His comment had come out of nowhere -  _ 'what if they really fucking deserve to die?' _ and Hux stretches out his long limbs as if he were sore from spending the night awake in an awkward, seated position. "Well that's down to whomever is doing the killing," he shrugs, stating it matter of factly, picking at a bit of invisible dirt on his knee.

****

"Why? Are you thinking about killing your landlord?" he asks casually, as if this were a perfectly normal subject to discuss. He would've killed the man himself while Kylo slept if he could have.

****

Hell, he'd even have let Kylo watch him do it. He deserves that much.

****

"Maybe," if he could get away with it. After washing his mouth out with the dubious tap water Kylo stumbles back to bed to pull the covers over his head and block out some of that pesky daylight. Really, killing that man would be a relief, one person less who torments him, it might put his living situation at risk, but the pros far outweigh the cons.

****

When Kylo settles back in, Hux slides down to lay beside him, staring upwards at the ceiling. "I'm not going to lie, he definitely deserves it. Piece of work." Hux folds his hands over his chest, watching motes of dust float in thin streams of sunlight while Kylo hides his head. "If we can find a way to disentangle me from that cuff, I'll gladly kill him for you," he comments darkly, flicking through the myriad ways he'd like to hurt the slob of a man downstairs who abused his power at the expense of the poor creature beside him.

****

If they could find a way to undo the curse that affected them both, he could do a hell of a lot more than just kill one waste of space.

****

"Is there a way?" Feeling needy and a little stupid for it Kylo scoots closer to the demon again, seeking the one spot of warmth and comfort he has in this world. At least under the blanket Hux can't see him blush. "If there is I'll do it." Curse breaking isn't the kind of thing you should agree to all willy nilly when he has no idea what it entails, for all he knows he'll have to sacrifice a goat or something. Where the fuck would he even get a goat in New York? It's not like he can just go to Petsmart for that.

****

“I...don’t really know,” Hux laughs nervously, looking a little embarrassed. As far as curses go, he really should’ve been an expert by now. Thinking nothing of the man moving closer, he drapes an arm around Kylo.

****

“This is all new to me. I’ve never actually spoken to one of the cuff’s wearers. Nor have I let things play out long enough to work out the details.” He was already acutely aware of some of the restrictions he had to work under, only able to physically interact with its wearer and small inanimate objects to an extent. Not able to cause mortal harm to the wearer, and well the most irritating part which he suspected by now that Kylo couldn’t actually see.

****

“May I try something?” he asks, pulling the blanket off enough so he can see Kylo’s face, nestled into his side.

****

Kylo blinks lazily at the light that sneaks in when the blanket lifts, he's about to complain when Hux's face blocks it off again and instead smiles softly. "Sure." From what he knows so far Hux can't hurt him so what's the danger?

****

Slim fingers reach down and cup Kylo’s jaw and Hux leans in close, their noses almost touching. “This might hurt,” he says,apologetically and then his lips are over Kylo’s, his hand moving through Kylo’s hair to the back of his head to hold him in place. The kiss only lasts for the briefest of moments,  leaving a burning sensation on Kylo’s lips. When Hux pulls away he gazes as him, questioning.

****

“Can you see it now?” he asks, and his hand travels to his neck where Kylo should be able to see a thin red cord digging into his skin. It travels downward from his neck, pooling in a puddle of coils and ends at the cuff attached to Kylo’s wrist.

****

It looks painfully tight.

****

"First of all, I'm sorry I just puked," he can't imagine that being a pleasant experience for the demon, on the other hand he's stunned by the simple gesture despite its meaning being something else, it's nice getting a kiss by someone who isn't so repulsive they have to pay him for it. "And yes, holy shit," following the cord from the cuff he's left with his hand on Hux's warm neck just below where the cord lays.

****

“It’s fine. You rinsed your mouth out. It’s not like I was caught unawares.” Hux nods, and has to admit that despite the very faint sour taste, it had felt.. nice. He filed this information away for later. “It’s good that it worked,” he smiles, pleased. The gift of his perception was only temporary and would fade in an hour or so.

****

"I'm sorry." It looks painful the way it's digging into the demon's smooth skin, there has to be a way to break it.

****

“It’s okay,” Hux brushes off Kylo’s apology. “But it’s getting tighter and I’m not sure what will lessen it. Apart from your death, but let’s not go down that road,” a strained laugh accompanies the words.

****

“So we find a way to remove it,” Kylo says, completely unsure of where to begin.

****

“Any ideas?”

****

"I doubt a pair of scissors would work," Kylo muses, tracing the cord with a finger abruptly pulling back when he realises he might be crossing a boundary. "What exactly about me dying is it that helps, maybe we can recreate it somehow or try to replace it." It's a long shot, but if there is a chance it might work he'll do it, whatever it takes. Even sacrificing a goat.

****

Hux shudders involuntarily when the human touches the shimmering line that connects them. The feeling is unnerving, like prickles of electricity running down his back. Was this only because he now knew it was there? “Magic scissors maybe,” he laughs, imagining Kylo wielding a ridiculously oversized pair of ornamental shears.    
  
“I don’t know.” Hux sighs, not proving himself very useful. “They die and the bracelet comes off and it’s like.. it’s like being allowed to sleep after being awake for too long. Then the next thing I know it’s been however many years and I’m tethered to someone else.” There’s a dark frown on the demon’s face, an exhaustion Kylo had yet to notice lurking deep in his burning eyes. “All I know is I have five days.” They have already used two.

****

“Maybe we can find someone else who might know. Any occult shops around here?” he asks hopefully. Nothing like a decent bookstore for some information.

****

"Uh, yeah, a few blocks up, I think," Kylo vaguely remembers passing by a hole in the wall shop that looks like it houses a coven of witches a few times, a sign advertising tarot readings outside. He'll brave that for Hux. If there's a chance they could find a solution there it's worth the anxiety of going. "We should get going." Ignoring everything screaming at him to stay in bed Kylo pulls himself up, almost finding it funny how he's still dressed from yesterday until he remembers why. From the kitchen he grabs a box of strawberry poptarts and a bottle of water to have on the way there.

****

"Are you sure?" Hux frowns, thinking the human might need a few more hours of rest after what he'd been through. But Kylo is already up out of bed, grabbing something to eat and so he follows suit. Adjusting his appearance so his attire is as it was when they met, he walks along beside Kylo, very aware of the short tether that binds them and that now they can both see it.

****

They arrive not long after at the shop and Hux looks unimpressed at the neon hand shaped sign proclaiming that they offer tarot readings and there is a psychic inside. "This looks...questionable," he grumbles, but it's the best option they have so he follows Kylo into the tiny shop. 

****

The interior is a mess. Jumbles of books on the shelves in no particular order, candlesticks, incense and all sorts of odds and ends. A tiny wizened woman lurks behind a tall counter and her head can barely be seen as Kylo approaches with Hux following close behind.

****

She sounds surprisingly bright as she peers at him through oversized spectacles. "Can I help you, young man?"

****

"I need to break a curse," Kylo decides to jump in head first, figuring if he sounds insane on the street in here it probably isn't that bad. He shows the tiny woman the cuff, careful not to tug on the line now that he knows it's there, it's already fading, but he'll never forget how tightly it was coiled around Hux's neck.

****

"A curse hmm?" she coos, grabbing his wrist with her wrinkled hand and yanking his arm closer to peer at him through her coke bottle glasses instead of at the cuff. "Which one," she cackles, no doubt making fun of him for being a hungover mess.

****

"The one that's killing my friend." He's well aware he's not exactly helping his cause by looking back at Hux for help.

****

She holds Kylo's wrist in an iron grip, glancing at the empty space behind him as if she can almost make out Hux. "You've got a nasty one here." Turning his wrist over she inspects the cuff in the light, running her fingers along the delicate traceries of filigree patterned in the metal. "Pretty piece, I can see why you were tempted to put it on."

****

She tries to shift the cuff, but it is clearly stuck fast, going nowhere.

****

"Well the quickest way to break it would be to expose it to something sanctified," she nods and then rolls her eyes at Kylo's lost expression. "Go stick your wrist in some holy water. Bracelet will drop right off," she explains in simpler terms, clearly annoyed with how little the younger generation seemed to know these days.

****

"Where the fuck do I find holy water?" Kylo thinks that's something he ought to know and probably would know if he was a little less fucked up at the moment.

****

"A church, stupid." The look she gives him could have killed lesser men.

****

"Will it hurt him?" If it'll hurt Hux more he's not all that hyped on the idea.

****

"Does it matter?"

****

"Yes, it fucking matters, I'm not doing it if it'll hurt him," he'd rather die than hurt Hux, it's not like he has a whole lot to live for even if he has started to change his mind about the whole suicide thing.

****

"Don't get crass with me, boy." She finally lets go of his wrist Kylo snatching it back and making sure he's well out of grabbing range as she roots around behind the counter emerging with a sharpie that she uses to scribble something on the back of her hand as she steps out from behind the counter. "Let me have a look at him," she says, putting her hand back on the cuff and shifting her focus to Hux standing next to him.

****

Hux watches the exchange, his curiosity piqued. He wasn't sure whether or not dropping the bracelet into holy water would hurt. They could certainly give it a try? Anything was better than doing nothing after all.

****

He tried to get a look at the symbols she has scribbled onto her hand, wondering how she would be able to get around the restraints of the cuff. Looked up he find her staring straight at him, having created a temporary connection to the cursed object with whatever sigil was marked on her skin.

****

"I take it you can see me now, witch?" Hux folds his arms over his chest, looking suitably unimpressed.

****

"Oh he's a looker. If I were twenty years younger," she grins, glancing him over once, Hux makes a face at the unwanted attention. It had been nice from Kylo but he didn't appreciate some fossil leering at him.

****

"If you were twenty years younger you'd still not have a chance," he huffs haughtily and glowers at her. "Now what is it you're looking for exa-" he is cut off suddenly as she gives an experimental yank on the cord, making Hux fly forward in surprise, choking on his words. "Just what the fuck do you think you're doing?" he snarls, clearly on the verge of launching himself at the old crone. She laughs and shakes her head and then turns to Kylo.

****

"I'm not sure if it will hurt him or not, but I can tell you now, he's already left  _ that _ ," she says, gesturing to the cord that binds them "for far too long. You're lucky he didn't persuade you to commit suicide really, considering just how many victims he's had."

****

She shuffles back behind the counter and sits down. "There's a church a few blocks from here." They've been dismissed now to uncertainty, and Hux glares at her from behind Kylo.

****

Kylo decides not to mention how his relationship with Hux had started out just thanks the woman out of courtesy and leaves. Once they're out of view of the shop he stops to face Hux, concern shining in his eyes. "Are you okay? She didn't hurt you?" If she did he might just go back in there and fuck some shit up even if she might curse him for it too.

****

Hux rubs his neck, glowering back at the shop behind them. “I’m fine. She didn’t hurt me.” Maybe his pride when she yanked him round like a dog on a lead, but he was uninjured.

****

“I’m not too sure about this holy water angle. But, let’s go give it a try so we can tick it off the list I guess.” He doesn’t say, but is caught off guard by Kylo’s concern for his well being. A little flame sparks to life within his chest and melts away some of the sarcasm and haughtiness he normally surrounds himself with.

****

“The sooner we are both free of this, the better.”

****

"Am I going to lose you if this works?" Kylo asks the pavement as they continue on up the street to find that church. He really doesn't want to lose Hux, not now when things are finally looking a little brighter for him. If Hux stays maybe he can get back on his feet again and find a way to survive without having to sacrifice any one part of himself.

****

Blushing faintly he reaches for Hux's hand, if this is the end he wants to get as much out of it as he can, dignity be damned. Not like he has much to lose, the demon having seen him at his lowest and still not pushed him away like everyone else.

****

"I.. don't know," Hux frowns, looking up at the looming figure of the church as they stood on its steps. He felt Kylo take his hand and managed a smile, fingers threading between his. "But if it does work, I'll do everything in my power to stay with you," he promises, having developed a soft spot for the vulnerable man.

****

Together, they ascended the steps and though he was hesitant, Hux didn't seem to be phased when they passed through the arched doorway. There was a faint electric tingle running across his skin which wasn't exactly pleasant, but he was overall fine. The church was quite large considering the neighborhood it was in wasn't exactly thriving. Candles were lit in sconces running parallel down either side of the main aisle leading to the altar. Large shallow bowls of holy water sat on either side of the smaller archways marking the entrance. Hux glanced at them nervously, unsure.

****

Approaching one of the bowls Kylo stares at the still water, apprehension growing in his gut. It just looks like water, like someone just turned the tap and filled the basin. It's anti climatic. He knew it wasn't going to sparkle or anything like that, but he had almost expected it to look different somehow, a little marker to indicate that it's been blessed. Hesitating he touches his free hand to the water watching it ripple when he pulls away.

****

Glancing up the aisle he watches the priest kneeling at the altar stand and make his way to the confessional, a couple of the people praying in the pews looking up at the movement, one of them follows after a moment. The last time he set foot in a church he'd been homeless and looking for a place to sleep, he'd been fresh out of college, broke and desperate thinking it couldn't possibly get much worse. If only he'd known.

****

Looking at Hux one last time Kylo untangles their hands, closes his eyes and submerges the cuff in one swift move.

****

The demon tenses visibly as Kylo thrusts his wrist into the pool of water. Nothing happened. Hux frowned, looking from the water up to Kylo and back again.

****

"Wait.." he starts, suddenly his eyes go impossibly wide, teeth grinding together. "Take it out. TakeitoutTAKEITOUT!" he's screaming now, falling bodily to the polished wood floor. The candles flare, filling the pews with light and startling the people who had been silently praying.

****

And Hux is screaming, an unnatural sound, his skin blackening and flaking away, the cord that binds them burns to nothing, a rope of ash dissolving before it hits the floor.

****

The flames gutter out, and the bracelet falls off of Kylo's wrist with a clatter. Hux is gone.

****

At the first scream Kylo yanks his wrist out of the water, but it's too late and he watches wide eyed and silent as Hux goes up in smoke. "Hux? HUX!" He wouldn't have noticed the cuff breaking away if it hadn't taken a significant weight with it as it clatters to the floor. She said it wouldn't hurt him. The commotion he's caused has drawn the attention of everyone in the church and split them between frantic prayer and wide eyed shock. Kylo couldn't care less where he's kneeling on the unforgiving floor. Regret leaves him feeling empty, the cuff cold when he picks it up and tries to put it back on his wrist, it won't stick, the metal warped out of shape, sharp edges leaving cuts in his skin.

****

"No, please come back," he whispers, there has to be a way. He has to get Hux back. The witch at the occult shop, she'll know, won't she?

****

Ignoring the priest slowly approaching him Kylo runs, maybe if he's fast enough she can fix it.

****

When Kylo frantically burst back in to the shop looking like a terrified animal, the old woman pursed her lips. "Well I wasn't wrong, looks like it came right off after all," she intoned, glancing at the cuff in his hand with its bloody edges, no longer locked around his wrist that bears the matching marks.

****

"I am guessing your friend wasn’t so lucky?" From the look on his face she knows she’s right. "Served him right. Such a disrespectful mouth on that one," she says with a malicious glint in her eye. Had she known that this is what was going to happen? She must have.

****

"Bring him back," Kylo pleads, "Please." He slams the cuff down on the counter not caring in the slightest if he scratches the wood or drips blood all over the place. It serves her right for taking Hux away from him.

****

"Why? He was a demon, boy, he would have betrayed you in the end," she scoffs flicking the cuff and watching it rock.

****

"No, you don't get it, I need him," voice cracking and eyes watering he's sure he must look like a mess, he couldn't care less all he wants is his one friend back. He'll do whatever it takes.

****

"You should be grateful you got out of this with your life." Her voice is like poison, each word stinging like salt in the wound. With a careless flick of her hand she sends the cuff roling back towards him, "I can't do anything with this. You can keep it as a souvenir, you selfish child," she spits, annoyed with Kylo’s inability to see the bigger picture. "You really have no idea how many lives that  _ thing _ destroyed. I did you a favour."

****

She stares at him, beady eyed behind huge spectacles. "Even if I could bring that wretch back, I wouldn't. Get out of my shop."

****

"Please, I'm begging you, I can't live without him," Kylo tries to put as much pleading into his words as he can, pushing the cuff back across the counter, without Hux things will go back to the way they were, he'll be left alone and forgotten to die, he doubts anyone would even come looking before his corpse starts to smell or his rent is due. He wouldn't put it past his landlord to fuck his corpse just for good measure.

****

"I said get out, boy, and be grateful." She throws the cuff at him and Kylo scrambles to catch it, slinking out of the store, knowing when he's not welcome.

****

He doesn't get far, sinking down behind a dumpster in an alley, wanting to hide from everyone and everything, without Hux by his side he's back to being an abandoned lamb in a flock of wolves, just waiting for slaughter.

****

As if the world hasn't been cruel enough already, the heavens open, pouring a torrent of rain down onto the city. It leaks through cracks in the dumpster, filling the alleyway with the reek of wet garbage. The onslaught of rain is torrential, and if Hux had been there, he no doubt would have pushed Kylo into action.

****

He would have nagged him until he hauled himself up out of the rain and carried himself back to his awful little apartment.

****

But there was no one there to push him, no warm comfort, no misplaced affection. Just freezing rain and a sewer slowly backing up and flooding the alley with filth.

****

He huddles closer to the wall, wrapping the coat Hux essentially bought him tighter around himself, clutching the gold cuff to his chest as the water soaks him to the bone. He might as well die right here, he reasons, no point in dragging it out, besides if he dies here maybe someone will find his body sooner and alert his so called family so they can finally breathe out and relax now that the black stain on the family tree is more easily swept under the rug.

****

A hand wraps around his upper arm, gripping tightly and hauling him roughly to his feet. If he had been praying for salvation, hoping that that hand belonged to a certain fiery haired apparition he would be sorely disappointed.

****

The squat frame of his landlord loomed, leering at his favourite tenant, the one who never put up a fight. That was why he kept on after him, of course.

****

"Too good for your apartment now are you?" he barks, dragging Kylo from his hiding spot and down the alleyway, back towards the building. He hadn't been able to help himself, knowing Kylo was an easy lay, and seeing him collapsed behind the dumpster like so much trash only fueled his fire.

****

Kylo doesn't protest, letting himself get towed along because what difference does it make, he's going to die anyway and he no longer gives a shit as to how. Doesn't matter if he freezes to death, bleeds out, or gets murdered by this human shit stain, so long as he's dead he couldn't care less. He just wants out.

****

********* **

 

The grip on his arm hurts as he stumbles along behind, quickly stuffing the cuff into his pocket so it won't get taken from him in his last moments as he's shoved through the door of apartment 1 that's far too well furnished for a building like this, he's long suspected the rent being used for nothing but greed, not a cent going to upkeep and maintenance. He's unceremoniously pushed to the floor, his ratty jeans yanked down to his ankles. No time wasted on pleasantries as he's left exposed on the floor for a moment his landlord returning accompanied by the slick noise of him stroking himself as he kneels behind Kylo.

****

The large man is crude in his movements, hurting Kylo, not giving a shit if he bleeds. When he’s finished, grunting his last, he leaves the sodden shivering wreck of a man on the floor, uncaring if he lives or dies, he’ll have his fun for as long as it lasts.

****

********* **

 

It goes on like this for the better part of a week, Kylo making no attempt to protect himself as his spirit is already so damaged.

****

Eventually, as Kylo himself had predicted, the grotesque man grows tired of the trembling, stinking mess in his apartment. It’s not clear what set him off, perhaps the way Kylo looked at him dead in the face, reminding him that this was an actual human being and not just an object, or perhaps it was the way he wouldn’t stop crying out for someone named Hux.

****

He already had him on his back so it was not much of a stretch to wrap chubby fingers around his neck and squeeze, watching Kylo’s face go red, then blue. He’d get rid of him, rent his empty apartment to someone else for double the rate, and find something else to abuse. Kylo was just something to be thrown away with the rest of the trash littering the streets around here

****

All Kylo can think as his landlord wraps his hands around his neck is  _ finally _ , at long last he gets to die and everything will be over. He only wishes it could have happened sooner, before he met Hux, before he had a taste of hope. Having it all taken away had been the straw that broke him, left him an empty shell with no will left to fight. He's so tired.

****

Spots dance before his eyes as the air is squeezed out of his lungs and his lips turn blue, almost there now, just a little bit more.

****

A spray of something warm splatters across his face as he verges on unconsciousness. The grip on his throat letting up before ceasing altogether as the landlord thrashes, blood gurgling from a deep rend in his neck.

****

The heavyset man collapses to the side, wheezing horribly as he dies. In the space left by him stands Hux, his face a mask of anger, his hands bloodied. Immediately his expression is stricken and he pulls the heavy black coat from his shoulders, draping it over Kylo’s thin frame.

****

Arms slide beneath Kylo’s back and knees, lifting him from the floor. Hux winces in disbelief at how light he is.

****

The door to the lavish apartment is shattered, hanging on bent hinges and Hux kicks it out of the way. They ascend the stairs, Hux careful not to jostle his passenger. From there it’s back into the tiny little apartment they had shared for a scant few days.

****

Hux gently lays him down on the mattress, smoothing his hair from his face. His expressions drift between heartbreak and all consuming anger.

****

Kylo is too far out of it to know what's going on other than to mourn his life going on. Can't even die right, he thinks as he's picked up and carried out of the apartment. Who's getting him now, he wonders, how long until they get tired? How long does he have to keep doing this. If he had the energy he'd cry, instead he stays limp as Hux lays him down in his own bed and cleans him off, wiping fresh blood from his face along with a disgusting combination of crusted blood, lube, and come from between his legs.

****

He remains oblivious for hours still, his breath rattling his his chest as his lungs force oxygen through his bruised throat. He just wants to die, why can't the world grant him this one small mercy? "Please kill me," he pleads on a wheezing breath to whoever has taken him. Please let it be over.

****

After cleaning him up, anger boiling beneath his calm expression, Hux shifts so Kylo lays cradled in his lap, blankets drawn up over his chest. They stay like that, Hux refusing to leave him alone for even a moment. ‘ _ Please kill me _ ’ Something breaks in Hux’s chest when the soft plea reaches his ears. And warmth pricks at his eyes. He leans down and kisses Kylo’s forehead. “But I only just got you back..”

****

That voice, it can't be. Hux is gone, he watched it happen, saw him turn to smoke on the floor of a church. This is nothing but a dream, a last fantasy to ease his death, it must be. "Hux?" he asks anyway, wanting it so badly to be true. If he gets to see his demon one last time he'll be happy. It isn't much to ask for, but his eyes feel like they've been glued shut, lids lined with lead. Managing to crack them open just a little gives him a blurry image of red and black, the unnatural warmth radiating from the man holding him making itself known. It's too good to be true.

****

“I’m here.” Responds a voice clearly not accustomed to ever being soft. He looked as human as he ever did previously, fingertips stained black, bright coppery hair gelled back away from his face, amber eyes full of worry.

****

“Do you need water?” he asks quickly, realising Kylo may have some basic needs. “Or.. something to eat?” His fingers stroke gently against his cheek. “Are you warm enough?”

****

A groan is all he can get out, exhaustion dug deep into his bones from days of what felt like endless torture, his body giving out too many signals to decipher what he needs. Deep down he knows he should be in a hospital, he has no insurance, people like him are just left to die, cheated by a system that claims to value them. This is the best he's going to get, he'd rather be here with Hux than anywhere else. Using what little strength he has he grips onto Hux's shirt, this is one hallucination he doesn't want to let go off.

****

Hux looks startled as Kylo grips tightly to his shirt, and gently holds him close. He is panicked, not knowing what to do. Human bodies are such fragile things and he has no idea of the extent of Kylo’s suffering. Did he need medical attention? Hux frowned, his brow furrowing. “Should I get you a doctor?” The way he phrased it sounded like he was going to march into a hospital and drag a doctor back here. If Kylo had asked that of him, he would. He would move the very earth just to keep him alive.

****

"Please," Kylo utters, there's so much pain in his body there's no way of knowing how much damage there is, really it's a miracle he's made it this far. There isn't much about him worth saving, but if Hux is really here it's worth it to try, if there's even the slightest chance he can be happy he'll take it. If not it would be easy to end it.

****

“Just... just hold on, okay?” He lifts Kylo again, this time with his blankets as well, cradling him close. Back down the stairs, he was soon out on the street. The pair of them were attracting a large amount of attention as he rushes them through the streets until he can hail a cab.

****

The automatic doors of the ER slide open for him as he bursts in, carrying Kylo in his arms. He marches straight up to reception and speaks to the nurse in charge in hushed tones weaving his influence into her exhausted mind.

****

Her eyes glaze over for a moment and she stiffly takes them to a private room where Kylo is laid in a clean bed. Nurses flitting around him, asking questions and setting him up with an IV drip. Hux collapses in the chair beside him, clutching at Kylo’s hand, watching the flurry of activity surrounding them. No one pays him any mind while they mend his human.

****

Kylo doesn't remember much of it, phasing in and out of consciousness as they put him back together. It still hurts, but is nowhere near what it was. When he wakes up it's to a parched throat and the smell of disinfectant, instantly reminded of how much he hates hospitals and wishing he had the strength to get up and walk away. As it is he doubts he could even stand on his own much less walk. Looking around the sparse room he finds Hux sat in a chair by his bed looking like he's been awake for days.

****

He's still here, there's no way he's a hallucination if he's still here. With some effort Kylo taps him on the arm, "Hux?"

****

"Hm?" Hux turns towards the sound of his own name and a tired smile appears on his face when he sees its source. "Welcome back." The tap on his arm makes him look down at Kylo's hand which he quickly captures with his own, gently circling his knuckles with his thumb.

****

"You were severely dehydrated," he begins, a sorrowful look on his face that things had even gotten so bad. "Amongst other things.." Kylo should know, he feels, how bad it had been, how much he’s survived.

****

When they had rattled off the laundry list of injuries which had included words like 'forced' and 'internal bleeding', Hux had slammed his fist into the row of windows that lined the room, making the nurse drop her paperwork in fright. He had settled down and allowed her to continue, but from the way his jaw ticked, it was taking a great deal of effort to keep himself together while Kylo slept behind them.

****

Now, he was content to simply hold Kylo’s hand, listening to the steady breathing over the chirp of a heart monitor. "How are you feeling..? I can ask them to bring you something to eat?" he suggests, noting the way he could make out the shape of Kylo's skull beneath his drawn skin.

****

Ignoring everything that's been said Kylo squeezes the hand in his with weak fingers, "You're here." His throat feels marginally better, less scratchy and swollen, but still sore, he's sure if he looked in a mirror his skin would be black with bruises. As long as he can't see it he can pretend it isn't there, a philosophy he's lived with for far too long when it comes to his health. "You're actually here," he repeats eyes locked on the beautiful demon sat by his bedside, the demon that saved his life when he himself had given up.

****

"I promised I would stay with you, didn't I?" Hux grins at the little squeeze of his hand. His face drops then for a moment. "I just didn't think it would take so long." But that was all a story for another time. He had managed to get to Kylo in time, though not before a dark ring of bruises was marked around his neck. 

****

A little too late.

****

"I wish I hadn't killed him so quickly." The demon’s eyes flash dangerously, the fingers of his free hand biting into the arm of his chair, fabric tearing under the strain. "But... when I saw what he was doing to you.. " His eyes fixed back onto Kylo's, deep and dark brown and so expressive. That had been what had driven that piece of shit to attempted murder, those soulful eyes, peeling away all of the filth and getting to the rotten core of him.

****

Hux drank him in, his long lashes, the scattering of beauty marks, his full lips. Even gaunt and drained of his colour, he was astonishingly beautiful.

****

"I thought I killed you," Kylo was so sure when that woman in the shop said he couldn't be brought back, he was so sure he'd killed the only person to give a shit about him. Now that he has Hux back he's never letting go again.

****

"I kept the cuff, I'm not sure if he took it," he was too far gone to look after the one part of Hux he had left, it wouldn't surprise him if that pig sold it to the nearest pawn shop for some extra cash. "I'm sorry."

****

Gently tugging Hux over Kylo scoots to the edge of the bed, restricted by tubes and wires it takes a little extra maneuvering, but soon he can press his face into Hux's soft stomach, breath in the warm, ashy smell of him that he's missed so much.

****

"You came awfully close," Hux laughs, trying to make light of the situation and as usual, doing a piss poor job of it. His eyes widening when Kylo said he kept the cuff, when he began apologising, and then he was pulling him closer, pressing his face against him.

****

He takes a deep breath, arms circling delicately around Kylo’s thin frame. He held Kylo against him gently, not wanting to disturb the myriad of cables connecting him to various pieces of machinery. Long fingers find his hair, slowly carding through it, gently working out tangles, Hux bends down to press a kiss to the top of his head, breathing him in, the smell of medical soap doing a poor job of hiding the sour notes of fear and suffering hiding beneath. "You're safe," his voice rumbles, warm against Kylo's scalp.

****

Something makes him take Hux's word for it, a little push that convinces him everything will be fine despite of where he is and that the hospital staff have no doubt contacted his parents by now if they've found out who he is. He hopes they haven't, he doesn't want them to have the satisfaction of knowing how their unwanted son has kept fucking up again and again. Doesn't want them to have the opportunity to gloat and say  _ 'I told you so' _ .

****

Closing his eyes and breathing slowly Kylo tries to think of anything other than what's brought him here, everything he's done wrong from day one, and instead focus on the good like Hux being here and holding him close, stroking his hair.

****

Hux lifts his head as a nurse enters the room, clearing her throat to make herself known. He nods at her, showing he's aware of her presence, but does not let go of Kylo who seems to need the contact.

****

"Now that he's awake, we need to ask him some questions before we can discharge him," she frowns, giving Hux an accusatory look, as if he were the one who had caused all of the harm that befell the poor young man.

****

"Kylo," Hux spoke his name gently, stroking his hand down his back. "Do you think you can manage to answer a few questions?" he prompts, trying to make his tone convey the message that he will send the nurse packing if Kylo's not comfortable speaking to her.

****

Wanting to get out of here as soon as he can Kylo agrees, hoping she won't ask him in detail about anything because he can't remember, his mind like an empty void since he left the occult shop, everything since a blur of pain.

****

"How old are you?" she starts, probably wanting to build a file on him. Kylo breathes a little easier knowing that means they don't know who he is.

****

"27, I think," he answers, he used to have both a phone and a laptop at some point, both sold in favour of food, he hasn't know the date in ages without looking at a newspaper. He's mostly been keeping track by the various holidays.

****

She asks him for his name, where he was born, his parents names, his address, and for a whole slew of other data. Hux listens, fairly sure Kylo either doesn't know or lies about the rest of it.

****

Then she turns to Hux and there's that frown again. "And.... Sir.. can I ask you to leave the room please? The next few are more... sensitive." It’s easy to guess what about. Hux looks to Kylo for approval before he goes anywhere.

****

Kylo shakes his head , gripping Hux just a little tighter, he doesn't trust the nurse even if she's paid to look after him. There's just too many times he's been hurt by the people who were supposed to look after him. Hux will keep him safe.

****

He stays put, feeling the grip of fingers digging into his shirt, making his chest ache with sympathy. In truth he did not wish to leave Kylo alone, but would have respected his wishes. "You can ask with me present," he says sharply, making it clear there is to be no arguing on this point.

****

The nurse presses her lips together in distaste and sighs, reading robotically from a clipboard, all attempts at bedside manner gone in favour of making it through the invasive questions. "Your examination indicates there was... some abuse of a sexual nature." Straight to the heart of the matter. "Did this man do this to you?"

****

Ah so that was why they wanted him out of the room. Hux feels a little ill at the thought. Yes, he had murdered indiscriminately, he had coerced others into ending their lives, he had destroyed countless others, but something about the thought of what that vile man did to Kylo feels far worse. And that she thought him capable of that. His face pales, struggling to keep himself from lashing out he waits for Kylo to set the record straight.

****

"No," Kylo states, voice the clearest it's been yet. "Hux saved me," saved his life and his soul, sadly his dignity is long gone and Hux couldn't save that too.

****

"Could you identify who did? Do I need to call the police?" she goes on, voice firm, yet with a softness around the edges leading him to believe she hates asking these questions as much as Kylo hates being asked.

****

"No, I didn't see his face, he kept me blindfolded," he lies not wanting the police to get involved afraid that they'll take Hux away from him when they see what's become of his landlord. Something tells him it's thanks to Hux that the law hasn't been alerted already.

****

She sighs heavily, writing something down, the smooth scratch of pen on paper. "And you, sir, could you identify him?" She turns to Hux having realised she won't be getting much out of Kylo.

****

“I...“ Hux falters for an imperceptible moment and then continues smoothly, blending something he had read in the newspaper about a cult and a string of deaths with Kylo’s lie. That was right.. Kylo had _lied_ for him, it was more than anyone had ever given him before and he reveled at the way it made his heart race. He would have to speak to him about it when they had some privacy.  “No. The.. assailants,”  he makes it plural, intent on preying on this woman’s sense of sympathy. “They were wearing bizarre masks,” Hux frowns as if recalling the event. “I am willing to give a statement to the police, however.” Not doing so isn’t really an option as it would put them both under the microscope for being obstructive.

****

The nurse blanched slightly when it was made clear that more than one person had been involved and she nodded curtly. “I will call for an officer to speak to you. After that we can discharge you if you’re feeling able to walk, young man,” she is speaking to Kylo with a soft edge to her words and then leaves the room at a clipped pace with a haunted look in her eyes. It’s not the first time she’s seen something like this and it likely won’t be the last.

****

It’s not long before a pair of police officers arrive, and when Hux sees them he disentangles himself from Kylo, squeezing his hand gently. “I’m going to go into the corridor to speak to them. I’ll be right outside the windows so you can see me, okay? Let me handle this.”

****

Kylo’s heart pounds in his throat as he watches Hux leave the room with the officers, fear hooking it's sharp claws in him, whispering in his ear that this isn't real, that he's still laid on the floor in his own mess being used for someone else's pleasure. Keeping his eyes on Hux through the window helps a fraction, his tall frame cut through by the half open blinds. "He's there," Kylo mutters to himself, pulling his blanket up to his nose with the age old idea that monsters can't get to him if he's under it at the forefront of his mind. It's childish, he knows, anyone could easily take it away from him, his body too weak to fight. Without Hux he feels like that proverbial lamb, tied up and set out for bait, free to whoever wants him.

****

It's not clear what's being said on the other side of the window, but the constant ticking of Hux's jaw is enough to indicate that he is not happy to be discussing it.  The city has had a recent string of murders, it's been all over the headlines, including the folded up newspaper near Kylo's bed that Hux had been flicking through while he slept.

****

He explained he was going to view an apartment he had been phoned about, the building was awful, but he would see it through, sometimes gems were hidden in the worst conditions. As he made his way to the office he heard screaming coming from apartment number one, right next door. Acting out of sheer heroism he had broken down the door to find a grotesque sight. Kylo, yes the poor victim in the other room, at the mercy of several assailants, all masked. Another dead at their feet, bleeding out from a cut throat.

****

It had all happened so fast, and to him appeared that they had performed some sort of ritual sacrifice and Kylo was next.

****

No, he hadn't thought of his own safety, he had only wanted to help the poor boy, yes he understood how stupid that was. Yes he should've waited and called the police. Hux fought the urge to roll his eyes at the chiding he was receiving. The pair of them didn't seem to give a damn about the suffering of the man in the other room.

****

They asked him for details of the location and he provided the address of Kylo's building. One of the men sucked his teeth at the address and Hux was informed that these sorts of things happened in that area all the time, it was to be expected, and a slew of other excuses. Well at least that meant they wouldn't waste resources on the investigation.

****

By now, with the door left hanging open, the crime scene was likely contaminated beyond reason, if the area was really so bad.

****

They asked for his details and he provided a false name and details of the hotel he was staying at - he was still looking for an apartment, then shook their hands and watched them walk down the corridor.

****

The door opened and he returned to Kylo's room. It was just the two of them again. "Hopefully that's the last we'll see of the police, I've spoon fed them a believable cover," Hux smiles easily when he sees how Kylo cowers under the blankets. "Do you think you can walk?"

****

"I don't know, everything hurts." What he does know is when Hux steps back into the room all his fears lighten and suddenly the monster under the bed isn't all that scary when he has the one of the meanest looking after him. Nothing can hurt him now.

****

Wanting to be good and make Hux proud Kylo hesitantly pushes the blankets off hating how exposed he feels in the flimsy hospital gown and hangs his legs over the edge of the bed. Sitting up hurts even worse, sharp pain lancing up his back and making him feel like he's been split in two. Biting his lip to keep from making any noise he tries to stand up, wobbling dangerously when his blood pressure drops causing his vision to grey at the edges for a few seconds.

****

Fuck it hurts.

****

Hux watches him cautiously as he tries to slide off the bed into a standing position. It's not long before all the colour drains out of Kylo's face and he goes limp. Arms are immediately around him, holding him steady and gently easing him back onto the bed.

****

"That's very much out of the question then." He can see how much pain Kylo is in and buzzes for the nurse. She arrives as he's laying blankets back over the stricken man. "He needs something for pain," he snaps, not understanding why he wasn't being given anything in the first place.

****

The nurse scurries off, and when she returns, it's with a syringe which is injected into Kylo's IV. "Morphine," she explains when Hux's questioning gaze lands on her and he nods. "He can have another dose, if needed, in 2 hours if the pain worsens. Other than that it'll have to be ibuprofen or acetaminophen."

****

She leaves them again and Hux stands vigil at Kylo's bedside, looking worried.

****

"Is it helping?" He has little knowledge of the drugs she had given him, simply nodding and assuming she knew best. He knew morphine could kill in large quantities but not that it was primarily used for pain. This was all completely foreign to him.

****

"Yes." The relief is near instant, the pain lessening into a dull ache at the back of his mind, "I fucking hate hospitals." With that he closes his eyes and lets himself drift, holding onto Hux's hand. The warm grip is a place to anchor himself to, a safe spot in this endless storm. He'll get through this too, he supposes. Surviving this long wasn't something he ever thought would happen, but his body has been steadfastly refusing to die for years now, eating itself in the name of survival. Now that he doesn't have to fight as hard it feels like a crushing weight is being lifted off him.

****

"I can understand why." Hux says, looking around and wrinkling his nose. "It all seems very... invasive. And there is so much death here. It's making my head swim." He watches Kylo's eyes drift closed and is relieved that the pain has released him from its grip for now.

****

"We can leave whenever you're ready. But until then I will stay here with you." And he means it too. When visiting hours are over, an orderly enters the room and announces this. Hux stares at him as if he has two heads. After a brief altercation in the outlying corridor, leading to some very raised voices, Hux returns to sit by Kylo's bedside.

****

"You really need to eat something," he says after what feels like hours of silence, having let Kylo sleep. The nurse has given him a new syringe of painkillers and brought a menu for dinner. Hux presses the flimsy paper into Kylo's hands along with a pen. It has tickboxes for him to choose which options he wants.

****

"I'll pick for you if you don't so.. I suggest you get on it." A roguish grin overtakes his lips, some of his true nature finally shining through after the hell both of them have survived.

****

Looking over the list Kylo comes to a conclusion he never thought he would; he wants hospital food. Though, he hasn't eaten in close to a week so he can just gorge himself on whatever he wants. A little dismayed he crosses off on some chicken soup knowing he ought to go easy on his shrunken stomach to not make this even worse for him. Handing the paper back his eyes land on the syringe in Hux's hand. "I don't want it," he gestures at the morphine, he's never much liked using anything stronger than what you can get at the pharmacy, too scared of developing an addiction.

****

“Are you sure?” Hux is frowning again, not understanding why Kylo would refuse something that brings such relief.

****

“Are you no longer in pain?” He leaves the capped syringe to one side and makes an amendment to the list in his hands when Kylo isn’t looking. “Oh did it make you feel sick?” he presses, surely that must be why. “If you feel sick I can call the nurse again?” His worry is almost to the point of overbearing, it’s becoming obvious Hux is out of his depth here. He’s never done this before, never tried to repair instead of destroy. It’s terrifying and difficult.

****

"I just don't like it, drugs scare me," he quietly admits. The way they dull the senses and alter his body, he doesn't like anything he's not familiar with. The only reason he still takes the drugs his therapist prescribed is because it's worse without them. "I'm fine," it's an empty reassurance, they both know he isn't fine, far from it, but as hindering as the returning pain is it reminds him that he's alive, without it it’s too much like being dead.

****

Hux sighs, not wanting to push the issue any further but he was concerned that it would take Kylo longer to recover if his body could not rest.

****

An orderly comes by to collect the dinner order and it isn’t long before a tray of food is delivered to the room. Hux accepts it and sets the tray on the weird little table that swung over Kylo’s bed. A bowl of soup, bread, water and juice awaited him, an oversized piece of chocolate cake, and a cup of coffee, which was evidently for Hux judging by the way he swiped it off the tray.

****

“I thought you might want something sweet.” Hux says sheepishly, shoulders drawing up to his ears in a brief shrug accompanied by a quirk in his lips and brow. The way Kylo had cried at having a piece of chocolate had struck him deep enough to leave a lasting impression. 

****

"I don't know if I can." Kylo takes in the piece of cake with big eyes, maybe a bite or two will be alright if he can get some of the soup down. The sweet gesture on it's own is nearly enough to make him cry again, the fact that Hux remembered how much he loves chocolate warming him from the inside out.

****

The soup is about as bland as you would expect hospital food too be, uniform and in need of salt, but it's still the best thing he's had in a long time. Having a warm meal is a luxury he can rarely afford, the best way of getting one going to the shelters that he tries to avoid. To just be given one with no consequence; he's almost expecting them to come take it away again.

****

"That's okay," Hux nods, nursing his coffee. It was objectively terrible, he sniffed and set it aside. "You don't have to force yourself. Though..." He rises from his seat, leans over and dips a finger into the thick frosting on the cake. His finger disappears between his lips and his tongue makes short work of the mess. 

****

"Mmhm. As I suspected." There’s a serious look on his handsome face as he removes the finger from his mouth, Kylo’s eyes glued to the movement, "It's terrible," he delivers in a deadpan so practiced it’s almost hard to tell he’s being playful. Hux slides back into his seat and gives the coffee a dirty look before picking up his discarded newspaper.

****

"These ritual killings are pretty interesting, I must admit. I wonder what they're trying to do," flicking through the pages, his fingertips as black as the newsprint, the demon hums thoughtfully. It was strange that no one at the hospital really seemed to take a second glance at his appearance. Perhaps only Kylo could really see the little details that made him look inhuman?

****

Kylo smiles slightly at the faint joke, he's getting increasingly fond of the demon's dry sense of humour, finding it charming and surprisingly human. He swallows another spoonful of soup, thoughtfully chewing on a piece of overcooked carrot. "I didn't even know something was going on, but now that I think of it there are a few regulars I haven't seen in a while." The homeless tend to come and go, but most stick to one area and when they do move they take their meager belongings with them. A few he's always seen around didn't. At the time he didn't think much of it, having his own issues to deal with, now he wonders how lucky he's actually been.

****

"It's none of my business really," Hux shrugs, glancing at some of the graphic images on the page. He was surprised that they would print something like this for public consumption. "I mean it's how I managed to come crawling back after all so if anything I should be thanking them." This is the first he had mentioned exactly how he had been able to come back into Kylo's life after what seemed to be a pretty final exit. "Though I think it was outliers who called me forth. Really messy work," he tsked, picking at his nails.

****

"How's the soup?" Hux changes the subject, settling the newspaper in his lap for a moment. Dressed in a black suit, with a paper and a cup of coffee sat barely touched beside him he looked the part of a rather sinister businessman. It wasn't far from the truth, really. "It looks... lacking."

****

"It sucks, I love it," Kylo answers truthfully.

****

"Did you get summoned?" People actually summon demons in this day and age? It sounds like such a medieval practice. "Did they sacrifice a goat?" He can't help himself.

****

A warm little laugh spills out over the comment about his soup. Does Kylo actually have a sense of humour? Hux had so far only witnessed pain and misery and the thought of seeing light break through the clouds filled him with, well he couldn't name it but it made him warm all over.

****

The laughter stops abruptly, fiery eyes zeroing in on the human, "Really..?" Hux folds his arms over his chest. "That's just... that's so  _ insulting _ ," he scowls, not really at Kylo but more the thought of someone sacrificing a goat of all things. He was worth far more than a goat.

****

"I did get summoned. No there was no goat. No one shows up for a goat anymore. It was human sacrifice, that usually does the job. The more the merrier and all that," he twirls a finger in the air in a bored gesture as if this is a completely normal subject to talk about. "It was shoddy work. The words were badly pronounced, they were lucky I heard them at all. Oh and the summoning circle was drawn incorrectly." A vicious grin takes him over.

****

"I am a stickler for detail and when I noticed their mistake.. well.. Let's just say they were foolish to stand in my path to getting back to you." The demon’s eyes soften. "I wish they had done it sooner," he winces as cold hard reality comes back to greet him, reminding him that he had been far too late to save anything other than Kylo's life. It simply was not good enough. He had not yet forgiven himself.

****

Something warm blooms in Kylo’s chest when Hux laughs, a little spark of happiness he'd thought long gone. Maybe there's hope for him yet if he can make a demon laugh. "I guess the exchange rate has gone up," he comments at the lack of goats. Still, he agrees that Hux is worth a lot more than that. He takes another spoonful before pushing the soup aside for now, not wanting to push it too far. It'll still be there later and eating it cold will hardly be detrimental to its taste.

****

"I'm just glad they did it at all," he tells the cake, doing like Hux did and helping himself to a swipe of frosting. It's the cheap kind you get at big box stores and the best thing he's had since the twix.

****

"Did you just make a joke?" Hux laughs at the quip about the exchange rate, delivered with such a blase tone that it catches him off guard. He realised the two of them in the grand scheme of things, barely knew each other, having only been trapped together for a handful of days, but in that moment he felt such overwhelming affection.

****

His eyes followed the way Kylo mimicked him, a swirl of chocolate frosting disappearing between full lips and he swallows, unable to look anywhere else. Hux rises from his seat, the newspaper falling from his lap, and nudges the tray away with his hip as he stands over Kylo's bed.

****

The way he's staring at Kylo with such intensity makes his expression difficult to read, his eyes flick to Kylo's for a moment, his hands rising up to gently press against either side of the human’s face, tilting his head up slightly for a better angle. This time he doesn’t ask, too absorbed by his own sudden desire. Leaning in close, their noses brushing, his breath unnaturally warm, his lips fall over Kylo’s, tasting of cheap chocolate frosting and bad hospital coffee.

****

Kylo’s heart feels like it's stopped when Hux kisses him restarting with a mighty jump and and an intake of air when his brain catches up. Leaning into it he takes a moment to note that familiar warmth radiating from the demon, the tingle his touch leaves behind. It's intoxicating in all the right ways, drawing him in and leaving him feeling safe and protected. It's perfect.

****

He's not sure why exactly Hux would want to kiss him, he's no catch, yet he won't complain. "At least I taste better this time," is the only thing he can think to say when the kiss ends.

****

When Hux pulls away, there is nothing tied tightly to his throat, no line connecting him, but like before, Kylo's sight is heightened, just for a little while. Hux's shape is outlined with a faint glimmer, and the dark stains on his fingers seem to move beneath his skin. If the stories were to be believed, the damned were once fallen angels and it shone in the cut of his cheekbones and the fire threaded through his hair. No one else could see him like this, this was for Kylo alone.

****

"You tasted amazing last time," Hux murmurs against his mouth, drawing Kylo's bottom lip in between his own to suck on it for just a moment, making his point. He draws back, sinking down into his seat, still gazing at Kylo with eyes full of affection and warmth. "You astound me."

****

"I don't understand why," Kylo says without thinking, too caught up in the otherworldly beauty sitting next to him, how he's practically glowing in the drab hospital room, a bright spot of light in his otherwise dark world. Absently he brings a hand up to touch his lips, feeling the warmth lingering from Hux's touch. It's the best kiss he's ever had, not that there's much to compete with. "I'm a mess." And isn't that the stark truth, nothing about him is really worth keeping, but for some reason this gorgeous demon wants him.

****

"Where should I start?" Of course he couldn't see himself the way Hux saw him. "Of all of the, mortals.." He says the word carefully, not wanting to remind Kylo of the difference between them both.."I have met, or let me rephrase; Of all the mortals I have killed, none has ever made me think twice about saving my own skin.

****

"You showed me no fear, gave me pause to think, and considering your history, that's impressive." He can't take his eyes off of Kylo, watching every tiny movement on his overly expressive face. "You were so.. difficult. And damaged. And beautiful..." he breathed, reaching out to take Kylo's hand. "When you're well enough to find a mirror with me, I will show you what I see." He gives Kylo’s hand a squeeze. "But for now you should probably try and get some sleep. Let your body heal. I'm not going anywhere."

****

Up until then Kylo hadn't realised how much he needed to hear that, needed to know he was worth the effort to care about, each word enveloping him like a soft embrace he's been missing his whole life. He makes no effort to stop the tears when they well up, letting them spill down his cheeks as Hux tells him why.

****

"Thank you," he sobs, squeezing Hux's hand in his, never wanting to let go.

****

Hux is taken aback at first when he realises Kylo is crying. Worried he’s said too much or been too short with him, concern creasing his face.

****

A choked out thank you makes his chest constrict painfully. The hospital bed was too small for two, so instead he moves to sit beside Kylo, drawing him into his arms. His soft sobs were bittersweet, only serving to make Hux want to hold him tighter while the rest of the world vanished around them. Nothing more mattered in that moment.

****

While wrapped up in Hux's arms it's easy to pretend they're somewhere with a soft bed and warm colours, somewhere clean and safe. Anywhere but here. He wishes this is something he could have had sooner, if he'd come across Hux before his life turned to shit. There's no point being bitter about the past, he can't change what's happened, he should just be grateful that he has Hux now. That after years of struggling he's finally found a secure handhold on the steep hill that's his life and maybe things might be ok.

****

It's not the first time he's cried himself to sleep, not by a longshot and it won't be the last, the difference is that this time he isn't left feeling empty and broken, but calm and safe.

****

As Kylo’s breathing evens out, Hux lowers him gently back to the bed, covering him with a blanket. Returning to his seat he settles in to keep watch over his sleeping human, unwilling to allow himself to slip into unconsciousness. He could go much longer without rest of any sort, and would not do so until they were somewhere safer.

****

Though he had not admitted it in front of Kylo, the rise in activity was something to be concerned about. There were forces at work that could have the potential to undo everything. Things rising from the depths of hell that only know despair and ruin.

****

The lights dim in the corridor for the benefit of the other patients and soon the small room is only illuminated by the faint glow of LEDs. Sat in the chair, he barely moved until the first signs of daylight began to filter through the blinds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Rape (marked by ***), very brief mention of necrophilia (there is none in the fic, just a mention), rape recovery, hospitals, drugs, murder, blood, suicidal themes, mentioned human sacrifice and satanic rituals, vomiting


	3. But Wait, it Gets Worse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> May the fourth be with you!
> 
> Triggers in the end notes, please let me know if I missed something that ought to be there.
> 
> Enjoy!

Kylo wakes feeling disoriented until the events that put him here come rushing back and he makes a noise of despair. Fuck. Opening his eyes he find Hux sat perfectly still in the chair by his bed, at least that part was real, he thinks, remembering the kiss from last night. Smiling at the memory only to be brought back to reality when a nurse slips into the room to unhook the drip leaving him to fend for himself again, they're going to send him home soon, his lack of insurance not making him worth the cost of keeping around. Kylo doesn't mind, he'd rather be in his crappy apartment than here.

****

“How are you feeling?” Hux’s voice breaks the silence as he stands up from the small chair, stretching all the tension out of his back. When the nurse unhooks the drip, he follows her out with his eyes. “Well they seem to think you’re feeling better at least.”

****

"I feel dirty," like he's been permanently stained by that man's touch, like he wants to scrub his skin raw to remove every trace of him. He's fucked a lot of people and sucked a lot of cocks in the name of survival, but all that did was make him angry at himself for sinking so low and sometimes even enjoying it. This on the other hand felt like being stripped of his humanity, found worthy of being nothing more than a hole to fuck. If he didn't know it would put a lot of people on the street he'd burn that building to the ground.

****

A dark frown creases the demon’s brow, immediately knowing exactly what Kylo means. He shouldn't feel that way, he should never have to feel like that again.

****

\--

****

The hospital discharges them with little ceremony, handing Hux a fat envelope and a plastic bag with Kylo's clothes in. He's still dressed in a hospital gown, with Hux's heavy coat secured around him, sat in the wheelchair the hospital made him leave in. They stand at the curb and Hux hails a taxi.

****

He carefully eases Kylo into the back seat, and then slides in beside him, giving the driver the address. Once the doors are closed, Hux pulls Kylo to him, holding him close during the trip, the driver raising an inquisitive brow as he looks in the rearview mirror at the pair.

****

The trip is far longer than expected and it soon becomes clear that they are  _ not _ headed back to Kylo's apartment.

****

Eventually, they pull up outside a grand hotel, flags snapping in the breeze above their heads. Hux stuffs a few bills into the driver’s hand and helps Kylo out of the back seat. "Can you walk?" he asks for the second time in so many days, his arm around Kylo's back to steady him. He has no qualms with carrying him if need be.

****

Kylo gapes at the building in front of them, anxiety had found its way back when he noticed they weren't headed in the right direction, he trusts Hux with his life, there's no questioning that, still he only wants to go home. Now, standing her on the curb by one of the ritziest hotels in town he no longer know what to think. They're staying here? Here with the sharply dressed doorman, waiting valet, and bellhops, how are they going to afford this? Can Hux actually talk them into a room here?

****

"I can try," he doubts he'd get far with the pain centered in his hips and he knows Hux will carry him if he asks, but he has to try. Standing here like he is, barefoot and nearly naked he wants to hold onto that remaining shred of pride he has and walk in, he can rest later.

****

Hux's hand never leaves Kylo's back as the two of them walk into the lavish hotel reception. Kylo is barefoot, draped in the demon’s coat and moving incredibly slowly, Hux by contrast is ever the well-presented businessman, clearly older than the young man he's escorting.

****

They attract more than a few stares and if Kylo could read the thoughts of those gathered in the lobby he would have blushed. They assumed Hux had brought him there to take advantage. No one moved to confront him, or stop him, or do anything to assist the waiflike creature at his hip. Instead a blind eye was turned as the affluent man ushered Kylo straight past reception and into the lift, taking them up to the 43rd floor.

****

"You can relax now," he murmurs over tinny classical music playing out of a speaker in the lift's ceiling, watching the numbers on the lit panel increase until they get to their floor.

****

He was right, it hurt like a bitch to walk in, every step shooting pain up his back. Thanks to Hux he made it, was able to keep his head down and concentrate on walking so he didn't have to look at anyone they passed by, he's sure if he had it would have made this that much more difficult to endure. Stepping off the elevator he's relieved to find the hallway empty as Hux leads him to the left, this high up the rooms are few and far between giving cause to his excitement of a comfortable bed. The room they step in is elegant with it's soft colours and plush furniture, the main room of the suite bigger than anywhere he's lived since leaving his parents house. He's almost afraid to touch, worried he'll somehow destroy the room and strip it of it's value just by being here. Exhaustion wins out and he lets Hux lower him onto the soft couch so he can catch his breath.

****

"I made a few arrangements while you were unconscious." Hux admits, rolling up his sleeves and cuffing them at the elbow. "There was no way in hell I'd have dreamt of taking you back to that apartment. I didn't want to even go within sight of the building." The thought of going back there made his chest hurt, more out of rage than anything; he had killed that wretched man far too quickly. He had not deserved a merciful death.

****

"I'll run you a bath. Just, try to relax for a little bit, okay?" Hux pressed a chaste kiss to Kylo's forehead and disappeared into the ensuite bathroom. The sound of running water echoed out of the porcelain tiled room and Hux reappeared after a few minutes, only to busy himself at the small kitchenette the room boasted.

****

While the bathtub was filling, he boiled the small electric kettle and made a cup of tea that was far more decent than the dishwater he had offered Kylo what feels like years ago.

****

Helping Kylo to sit up, he pressed the warm mug into his hands. "I hope this one makes up for last time. I can make a decent cup of tea given the right equipment," he smiles and brushes his fingers against Kylo's cheek, stroking hair away from his face.

****

"You're still so cold..."

****

For once in his life being helpless doesn't make Kylo feel threatened and he accepts the tea without question finding it much improved from the last cup Hux had made him. It's nice being able to drink something made with water from a tap and not have a fifty fifty chance of becoming ill from a dead rat in the pipes. "Thank you," he doesn't think he'll ever stop thanking Hux, nor should he, without him he'd be a cold corpse by now, dumped god knows where to rot away.

****

Hux smiles and steps away again, slipping back into the bathroom to sort out the bath, while he's away Kylo takes another look around the room, not quite believing he gets to stay here. It's not long before Hux is back, helping him up and guiding him into the steamy bathroom full of a soft scent that he can't name as anything other than luxury. While stripping down he keeps his back to the large mirror over the sink not wanting to see the damage on his own body, certain he wouldn't be able to handle it if he did.

****

Hux turns away, allowing Kylo some privacy in which to disrobe. He waits until he can hear him sink into the sudsy water before turning around again. With his sleeves already rolled up, he circles around to the back of the bath where Kylo’s head rests. He carefully wets his long dark hair, then grabs a little bottle of hotel shampoo. Pouring a small measure into his hands, he gently works it into Kylo’s hair, massaging his scalp in gentle circles. “Just relax.”

****

In that moment Kylo feels like the most spoiled man in the world, able to isolate the world to this bathroom and push away all he's been through just for a moment in favour of enjoying this. He's always loved it the few times someone has washed his hair for him, this is by far his favourite simply because it's Hux who doesn't even mention how much he needs a haircut or tells him to go shave if he forgets for a few days.

****

Hux ignores the way the tiled floor grinds into his knees, focusing solely on the task at hand. He spends longer than he needs to gently washing Kylo’s hair, immensely enjoying the little sighs of pleasure he keeps making. This bathtub was well made and the faucets included a detachable shower head. He picks it up with damp hands, gets the water to a reasonably warm temperature and rinses all the shampoo from his hair.

****

The water stops again, and Hux’s hands return to his head to work conditioner through the wet strands. His nails graze gently against his scalp, strong thumbs kneading into the back of his neck to ease away any tension there. When several minutes have passed he rinses the conditioner away, then squeezes the excess water out of his hair, placing a hand towel over the edge of the bath for him to rest his head on.

****

“I’ll leave you to relax. Take as long as you need.” Comes a low, accented voice by Kylo’s ear. Getting back to his feet Hux pads barefoot to the little sitting area to give Kylo some privacy in which to bathe.

****

Kylo isn’t entirely sure how he feels about being left alone yet, fear creeping back into the corners of his mind. Glancing at the cracked door Kylo helps himself to the soap and starts rubbing down making sure he gets into all the spots the hospital didn't, scrubbing in places until his skin is pink and raw. Still he feels the phantom hands on his hips and thighs, stale breath on the back of his neck. This is one nightmare he won't get rid off easy.

****

In one way he's grateful Hux let him do this on his own, this way the demon won't have to see his body either, won't have to touch his bruised skin or look at the rug burn on his chest and knees. He doesn't much want to look a or touch it himself so he doesn't blame Hux for choosing not to. But at the same time he wishes Hux were here to keep him from falling back into that pit.

****

While Kylo struggles to wash away memories that just won’t fade, Hux makes himself a cup of coffee. The clink of a spoon against china filters into the bathroom and he settles back onto the sofa. He flicks on the large flat screen television to a news channel and turns the volume up. Drinking the coffee, which was much improved from the swill the hospital provided, he watches the story with rapt attention. More ritual killings, perpetrators still at large, people are asked to stay indoors at night.

****

Worrying.

****

After a while he realises there’s little sound coming from the open bathroom door so he calls out gently to his companion not wanting to disturb his privacy. “Kylo, are you alright?”

****

"No," there's no point in lying as he sits here in the cooling water, scrubbing a washcloth between his legs and gritting his teeth against the pain. The cloth comes back stained red, the water turning pink around him. He should stop. Rationally he knows he won't be able to wash away a memory no matter how hard he tries, though it doesn't stop him from trying as he moves on to scrubbing at the rugburn. Maybe if he makes the damage his own he can better pretend it didn't happen.

****

Hux bursts into the room with no ceremony. He walks to the side of the bath and his breath catches when he sees red blooming on the cloth clutched in Kylo’s hands. Ignoring the state of him; too thin, mottled with bruises and scars, he leans down and lays his hand over the cloth to gently pry it from his stiff fingers.

****

Helping him out of the bath, Hux drapes a towel around him, followed by one of the fluffy white complimentary bathrobes the hotel provides. When Kylo falters, wincing in pain, Hux scoops him up in his arms and carries him out of the humid bathroom.

****

They walk through the lounge, where the news anchor is now reporting a fluff piece about some local hero and carry on through to the bedroom. The bed is a grand affair in and of itself, with too many pillows and a goose down comforter which Hux deposits Kylo on top of.

****

His aching body screams out in gratitude for the soft bed when Hux lowers him onto it, though nearly every inch of him feels like he's been dipped in acid with the way the air stings his raw skin. "I can still feel him," Kylo confesses to a pillow.

****

Water runs from his hair leaving behind tickling paths on his neck, there's something wet between his legs too, but he can't tell if its blood or water, or just the memory of something worse.

****

Hux moves to the other side, climbing onto the bed to sit with Kylo. He looks lost, angry, not knowing how he can help or what he can possibly do to make things any better. Basic needs, yes, but this was deep scarring and apart from revenge which had already been enacted he had no options. So he asks.

****

“Tell me what you need,” His voice comes out strained, even he struggling to address what he saved Kylo from. It hurts to be helpless in the face of Kylo’s pain. “Tell me what to do. I don’t know what to do,” he chokes out his admission, arms circling around the raven haired man drawing him to his chest.

****

"I don't know," and he doubts there is anything that can be done. What he wants is to drink until he passes out, he doubts Hux would let him when he's in this state, that's probably for the best. Getting drunk now could be the little push his body needs to give up on him entirely and then Hux's efforts to save him would have been wasted. "Just stay with me, please." Clinging to the demon Kylo closes his eyes in an attempt to block out his own mind only to make it worse, he keeps them open from then on, finding it easier to be in the present where he can see the fine fabric of Hux's shirt and part of the abstract painting on the wall behind him.

****

“Of course I will. Let me just make a few small adjustments,” hux nods and carefully pulls the comforter out from underneath Kylo first, to drape it over him. He then fiddles with the buttons on his shirt, removing the garment along with his trousers. This leaves him in black underwear and a black undershirt, comfortable enough to sleep in. He climbs beneath the comforter and holds out an arm, offering Kylo a place to curl up at his side with his head on his chest.

****

Kylo gratefully takes the offer, scooting up to Hux's side and tucking in as close as he can get, basking the the warmth and smell of him. This is home now, he realises as they settle in against each other, for the first time in years he has a place to call home. The feeling washes over him like the first ray of sunshine after a long, dark winter, slowly heating him from the inside. Maybe with enough time it can even heal a few things left untended for too long.

****

Hux let’s out a breath he didn’t realise he had been holding as Kylo settles in beside him like a piece he hadn’t known he was missing. Though they had barely known each other for more than a few days put together, Hux felt unmistakably drawn to Kylo and wanted nothing more than to see him whole again.

****

He slowly stroked his fingers through damp hair, the arm wrapped around Kylo pulling him closer. In the few places where their bare skin pressed together, Hux revelled in just how cool and soft his touch was, perfectly offsetting the heat he himself radiates.

****

After such a long time fraught with death and worry and little else, the luxury of rest in such a soft and comfortable place feels like a dream. Hux’s eyes slide closed, feeling safe enough to let sleep take him.

****

For a while Kylo watches Hux sleep, drinking in the way his face softens in relaxation and feeling bad for keeping him awake for so long, he can't remember seeing Hux asleep even for a minute since he came back. He has no way of knowing how long it's actually been since Hux saved him and it can't be healthy to stay awake for all that time, demon or no. Eventually exhaustion catches up to everybody. If anyone has earned the rest it would be Hux for always sitting vigil by him when Kylo is too weak to be on his own, scared of ghosts and ghouls, memories from a life he left behind.

****

He wonders, for a moment, what his so called family is doing, where they are. How relieved they are to not have to deal with him anymore, replacing him with someone better.

****

No matter, he doesn't need them now that he has Hux.

****

Hux sleeps soundly, for a while, his chest rhythmically rising and falling. After an hour or so, he twitches in his sleep, his muscles spasming and his temperature increases rapidly. He curls into Kylo instinctively, nuzzling his face against him, and moans as if he were in pain. The nightmares plaguing him reach a fever pitch and he awakens with a start, crying out, gasping for air, eyes wide.

****

Kylo startles out of his light sleep when Hux cries out, his heart hammering in his chest at the sudden expulsion into wakefulness. "Hux?" he asks softly, voice full of worry as the demon clutches him almost painfully, radiating unnatural heat leaving Kylo sticky with sweat where they're touching.

****

Hux sits up, staring into the dark, the grip of his nightmare fading away. He looks around, disoriented for a few seconds and when his vision clears he remembers he is not alone. “I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” Releasing his grip he lays on his side, face to face with Kylo, searching his eyes in the dark.

****

"No," he doubts there'd be any marks, "Are you ok?" his concerns for Hux is much more pressing than another little ache amongst what feels like thousands already.

****

“Yes and no,” Hux sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose and furrowing his brow. “I just... I have a bad feeling.” It sounded ridiculous but his dreams had left him feeling anxious and it showed clearly on his face. “But all that matters now is you’re here, with me, you’re safe, and we can try to put things right.” His hand drops to Kylos cheek and he presses an affectionate kiss to his forehead. “Go back to sleep. In the morning, if you’re feeling up for it, we have work to do.”

****

Kylo wants to dig deeper, to latch onto this and help Hux like Hux has helped him, but his body betrays him with the gravel in his eye and haze over his mind. In the morning he tells himself, then he won't let go of it, he owes his demon that much at least.

****

When morning finally arrives, warm rays of sunlight filter in through the gauzy curtains, rousing Hux from his sleep. He felt better, having made it through the rest of the night without incident.

****

Rolling off his back and onto his side, his eyes roam over Kylo’s sleeping face, drinking him in. His dark curls fanned out over white pillows, the soft rise and fall of his chest, his full lips parted in a relaxed pout. Like this he looks incredibly peaceful, and Hux tries to imagine what he would have been like if none of the cruelty of this world had befallen him.

****

Carefully, he extricates himself from the sleeping man, and disappears into the adjoining room to order them some breakfast. He has a large list of tasks that need doing today in order to set the pair of them up, but eating something first would be wise. Knowing Kylo would likely struggle to eat much, he orders a selection of fresh fruit, pastries and coffee. It’s not long before there’s a knock at the door and Hux opens it to accept the food but doesn’t let the member of staff in the room.

****

Still dressed in just his underclothes, he carries the tray of breakfast into the bedroom and sets it on the bedside table near where Kylo sleeps. He pours himself a cup of coffee and leaves the room to watch the news, leaving the door pulled to so the noise won’t disturb Kylo too much.

****

There's a brief moment of panic when he wakes up alone, that familiar fear that all this is just a hallucination and he's still in that cursed apartment, then the muted sounds of the tv reach him along with the ever present New York traffic outside, hardly so much as a faint buzz this far up. He's still safe. On the table next to him there's a tray of food, the sentiment makes him smile as he plucks a piece of apple from the wide plate thinking of all the times he's skulked around the markets pilfering bruised fruits when no one was looking. It's crunchy, tart and fresh, giving him a little boost in energy just from the taste alone.

****

Knowing he can't eat too much he settles for trying a piece of each fruit that's been delicately laid out, some of them he's never had, all of them delicious and juicy. It's luxurious for a lack of better word, the flavours ranging from sweet and mellow to tart and bitter, so damn good it makes him want to cry. Too good to last, that awful feeling that this will all be taken away from him lurking in the back of his mind.

****

Hux sips his coffee, pulling a soft fleece blanket around himself. A couple of commercials play, advertising some new breakfast cereal with extra fibre and another advertising some big pharma product that would solve all your problems judging by how happy the actors looked.

****

Hux rolled his eyes and then choked on his coffee when the company’s logo flashed onto the screen. His blood turned to ice as he stared at the television, holding his cup in shaking hands.

****

No. It couldn’t be.

****

He knew that sigil.

****

Pain is still a nuisance, but his bladder is demanding attention, forcing Kylo to drag himself out of the soft bed and toddle his way out of the bedroom only to find Hux sat on the couch looking like he's just seen a ghost, something akin to fear in his fiery eyes. His bladder can wait. "What's wrong?" he rasps in his sleep laden voice, leaning against the back of the sofa to ease the strain on his legs a little.

****

The sound of Kylo’s voice breaks the spell and Hux realises he’s gripping his cup of coffee so tight his knuckles have gone white. Colour has drained from his face he looks up at Kylo, trying to school his expression into something calmer.

****

“I...“ he doesn’t know where to begin, doesn’t want to tell Kylo too much lest he scare him off. “Do you know anything about the company that makes um.. they called it Levanox? That ad that was just on was talking about it. I think I recognise the logo from somewhere,“ he downplays how badly he had been shaken by asking the question, expecting Kylo to know little of some pharmaceutical giant; why would he?

****

A little tickle at the back of Kylo’s mind reminds him he's seen that name nearly everyday for a long time without ever really seeing it. "That's the pills I have," the near empty orange bottle sat on his bathroom sink, "had," he corrects, they're probably gone now. Being away for as long as he has now it's likely what used to be his apartment has been raided and stripped of everything worth taking if someone else hasn't already claimed it.

****

"It's an antipsychotic. Why?" Something is very obviously wrong though Hux is trying to hide it.

****

Hux’s pupils shrink, his eyes going wide when Kylo tells him not only does he know of the drug but he’s been  _ taking it _ . Not only that, but an antipsychotic was being advertised like some kind of fix-all miracle pill with happy smiling people and no description of what the drug actually did.

****

“Does it .. work?” Possibly an insensitive question but Hux finds he’s actually frightened for Kylo, knowing he’s ingested something potentially dangerous. “Any side effects?” He’s still  to get to the crux of the matter.

****

"I don't really know, it doesn't make it worse, I guess," he's never actually thought that hard about whether it works or not, he just took what was prescribed to him and hoped it would work. Now that he's thinking about it on the other hand. "I never used to hallucinate before I started taking them," that had never been an aspect of his metal issues before.

****

"I'd taken one the day we met because I thought I'd finally gone insane." The possibility that Hux was real hadn't even occurred to him before the demon touched him and took it one step further than any hallucination he'd had before.

****

“It might just be coincidence then,” Hux frowned, restlessly tapping his fingers against his cup of coffee. He was clearly agitated about something but was tiptoeing around it. There was little he could do from here anyway, not without some research. “How did you sleep?” he changed the subject, turning off the television and finishing his now cold cup of coffee.

****

"Pretty good, all things considered," it had been nice to sleep somewhere clean and soft for once on a mattress he hadn't rescued from the curb. His legs are getting tired from standing so he figures he ought to go on with his original quest before Hux had sidetracked him and made him even more worried about things in general.

****

"You?" he calls out from the bathroom where he's leaning on the sink and trying his hardest not to piss on the floor while avoiding his own reflection on the obnoxiously large mirror.

****

“Hm?” Hux seemed distracted, something still holding his attention. He picked up the paper that had been delivered with breakfast and turned towards the back. “Oh, um, yeah. After I settled back down,” he smiled to himself. “The company was nice,” he added, and it was true, he was surprised by how nice it had felt to wake up next to Kylo. He was actually feeling in good spirits until he’d turned on the tv.

****

Uncapping a pen he circled a couple of ads for apartments to rent and stretched with a yawn. “Will you be okay staying here for a couple of hours so I can sort out a few things?” Hux asks, feeling it’ll be quicker to get things done if he doesn’t have to drag the man halfway around the city. “The door has a chain on it and I won’t be more than four hours.” Leaving his spot on the couch Hux saunters over to the bathroom to wait his turn. 

****

"I guess, I could watch TV," Kylo makes no attempt to hide the excitement he feels at getting to watch tv in comfort as opposed to catching bits and pieces in the window displays of electronic stores before the employees chase him off, he's even been paid to leave a few times because he was  _ "disrupting business" _ by being there.

****

"I think I missed out on the Dexter finale," he quips, having very little interest in watching a years old show about a serial killer after recent events. As he goes to wash his hands it's impossible not to catch a glimpse of himself, he truly does look like he's been kept as a fuck-toy for a week and not been fed in months. It's revolting and he doesn't understand what Hux sees in him.

****

Hearing the water running, Hux assumes it’ll be safe to enter. He finds Kylo staring at himself in the mirror and pads across the room to stand beside him. Kylo is slightly taller than him he notes, something he had not picked up on before.

****

His arms circle around Kylo’s shoulders from behind and he leans in, not missing the stricken look on his face. He looks malnourished, he is bruised, Hux can count the knobs of his spine but that’s not what draws him in.

****

Slim fingers slide into dark hair and Hux leans in close, kissing him in full view of the mirror. He savours the taste of fruit, making an appreciative sound into Kylo’s soft mouth. He pulls back, leaving lingering warmth, and turns Kylo’s head towards the mirror.

****

“Look.”

****

And there staring back, stood in the embrace of the redhead was a stunning black haired vision. The bruises were there but suddenly seemed unimportant, the dark circles under his eyes only made him look more appealing somehow. He would find his reflection utterly intoxicating. Hux smiled, waiting to see his reaction.

****

“This is how I see you,” he murmurs, knowing the effect is temporary but hoping it will have some lasting effects on Kylo’s self image.

****

Kylo is speechless, staring at the reflection in the mirror he refuses to believe is himself, it's just not possible, but when he moves to look at Hux so does the man in the mirror. It's undeniably him that's staring back when he fixes his eyes back on the reflection, all the signs are there, every scratch and bruise, every rib he just looks beautiful. This is how Hux sees him. Being able to look past all his faults hits him somewhere deep inside, breath catching in his chest as he struggles to comprehend how anyone can find him so enchanting.

****

Once, maybe, he'd been worth looking at, when he'd been fit and healthy, when he took pride in his body instead of selling it to survive. Now he won't have to do that anymore, with Hux's help he could return to that someday, be able to look in the mirror and not be disgusted with what he finds.

****

"Thank you," he turns his back to the mirror, finding Hux much more enchanting with his otherworldly aura, unable to resist he takes another kiss, soft and brief, not wanting to be greedy with the demon's affection.

****

Up until now, Hux had taken the lead albeit gently and cautiously. After what Kylo had suffered he refused to put him in a situation that would make him feel vulnerable. But now, here he was, returning the affection and it made what was a faint glowing ember ignite in a blaze of heat. Hux was brought low in that moment, a little moan escaping him as Kylo pulled away.

****

He rapidly composed himself, biting his tongue, and drew a breath. “Go catch up on your TV,” he manages, leaning heavily against the bathroom countertop. “I’m going to shower and head out.”

****

After everything Kylo didn't think he'd ever want anything to do with sex at all, but the little noise Hux makes sends a surge of pride and satisfaction through him. Hux made that noise because of him, yet nothing about it makes his skin crawl like he thought it would, though he doubts he’ll be able to act on it for a long time still. It must be because of how safe the demon makes him feel.

****

Kylo trusts him.

****

Nothing would suggest Hux wants to hurt him in that way and that leaves him feeling more protected than he ever has before. Smiling softly he slowly makes his way back to the couch, sinking into the soft cushions with a sigh and picking up the remote before getting as comfortable as he can without aggravating any injuries. Flicking through the channels leaves him feeling like a starving man at a buffet, eventually he settles on reruns of Just Shoot Me, basking in the nostalgia of his favourite sitcom growing up.

****

With Kylo settled in comfortably, Hux has a quick shower and changes back into his clothes from the night before. Less than ideal, but it would do.

****

“Four hours,” he reminds Kylo, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. “Deadbolt the door behind me, ok?” he asks as he leaves, knowing the additional protection would make him feel safer, and Hux was still ill at ease about the ad he saw that morning.

****

Leaving the room Hux heads out into the city with a page of the paper in hand. The seasons are changing and there’s a bitter edge to the wind, making him wish he had brought his heavy coat, despite being naturally warm Hux despises the cold.

****

He goes to the bank first where an attractive young teller is all too eager to succumb to his suggestion that she makes a large withdrawal from a corporate account. Armed with far more currency than one should carry on their person, he spends the next several hours taking care of essential business.

****

When Hux leaves Kylo does as he's told limping over to the door to slide the bolt shut and make sure it's locked. Without Hux the suite feels empty and too big, prompting him to drag the sheets off the bed along with the tray of food and huddle up on the couch again, building himself a little nest of blankets that he stays firmly in until hours later when there's a knock on the door. Heart in his throat he carefully peeks out the peephole, acting as if whoever is on the other side can see him looking out. A held breath wooshes out of him when he see the familiar red hair, clumsy hands rushing to slide back the bolt and pull the heavy door open to let Hux and his load back in.

****

Once the door is closed behind them, safely reinstating the barrier keeping the rest of the world out, Kylo reaches for one of the bags only for Hux to brush him away and carry them the rest of the way in while Kylo trails after him like a lost puppy.

****

Smiling Hux eyes the little nest of blankets and food, Kylo still in his bathrobe from the night before. “I see you got comfortable,” he’s pleased, enjoying watching the apprehension fade away.

****

He sets the first of many bags on the small table in the lounge. “Lunch.” he explains “I didn’t know if you’d be hungry. Or what you’d want to eat so.. well hopefully it’s ok.” Hux felt a little awkward, realising though he had seen some very intimate and shameful moments he actually still knew so little about Kylo. The bag contained some sandwiches and drinks. Nothing too complicated, but the food looked good and seemed agreeable enough.

****

“And then these are for you.” He continued, piling several plastic and paper bags on the sofa. There were several days worth of clothes, mostly in black and shoes, also in black. Hux had gotten boots and trainers to be safe.

****

“I wasn’t sure about your size so there was some guesswork there,” he admits, rifling through another smaller paper bag. “And this,” he says, handing over a smartphone with a pay as you go SIM card.

****

The rest of the bags are his own clothes and a second phone for himself as well. Seemed prudent they both had one.

****

"I don't even know my size," is all Kylo can think to say, he doubts remembering that his chest had been 44 inches at the biggest five years ago would be very useful. Looking at the phone he marvels how much bigger they've gotten since he last had one, this one even looks like a normal size in his hands. It's all a lot to take in, the phone, the clothes, all together this is more than he's had to his name since shit went south and Hux just handed it over to him like it was nothing.

****

Eager to get out of the robe and feel a little more human Kylo doesn't think twice as he peels off the soft terrycloth and digs up a pair of sweats and a hoodie, both are a little big, giving him room to grow into. Not knowing what else to do he wades through the bags on the floor to wrap his arms around Hux, tucking his face into the demon's neck and just holding on.

****

As far as Hux was concerned material goods are unimportant but a necessary evil if they want to get by. He had chosen a variety of clothes for Kylo, including jeans and t-shirts, a couple of hoodies, a warm looking coat, and a few nicer pieces. However, he hadn’t expected him to get dressed straight away and quickly turns his back when Kylo starts undressing.

****

“I can always go back if th-“ he starts, slowly turning back round when enough time has elapsed. He’s cut off mid sentence by Kylo throwing his arms around him, the taller man burying his face in the crook of Hux’s neck.

****

He’s taken by surprise at the strong reaction. After all they’re only clothes. Automatically his arms circle around Kylo, holding him close. He angles his head so his cheek presses into waves of dark hair.

****

“Are you okay?” comes a voice sounding concerned at the sudden display of affection. He was overly cautious, and his stomach lurched when he concluded that in the past Kylo had not likely been given anything, not without a steep price tag or strings attached. His mood darkened when he found himself thinking about Kylo’s landlord. About the way Kylo was so blasé when Hux had first revealed himself, turning to him and saying _ ‘I'm going to sit down and open my mouth for whoever wants it. Then I can get drunk and you can do your thing’  _ He had been worn down, so thin he had little fight left in him. Even where Hux was concerned, Kylo had not been frightened at all. He wondered just how many times Kylo had subjected himself to such abuse just for a place to sleep or something to eat. He wondered what on earth could cause someone to be so pliant, even in the face of death.

****

He certainly didn’t seem that way now. His arms tightened around Kylo protectively and his thoughts bled back to the advert he had see on the television that morning. Biovitra Pharmaceuticals... their company logo still etched into his thoughts. Beneath his polished exterior, the same symbol was branded crudely into the skin just above his left hip. It couldn’t be a coincidence.

****

"Yeah, I'm fine, I'm good," Kylo isn't entirely sure for whose benefit he's saying it, "Thank you." He clings to Hux a while longer, letting his heat seep into the new clothes and warm his skin, putting him one step closer to being human again. Eventually he pulls back when his legs start to tire and the ever present ache becomes too much, limping back to his spot on the couch to rest a few minutes. On the TV the add from that morning plays again and Kylo can immediately see why Hux had thought it strange.

****

Like most ads for medicine it's portrayed as a miracle cure, but this is excessive to the point of looking brainwashed. It leaves him feeling uneasy.

****

The sofa shifts as Hux sinks onto it beside Kylo, staring up at the television alongside him.  He can see the look on his companion's face and it mirrors his own unease. "I haven't been ... completely forthcoming with you." He admits, glancing at the food on the table but feeling absolutely no desire to eat anything.

****

"But if my suspicions are correct.. you have to promise me you won't take that, whatever that is, ever again," The demon frowns deeply, the thought of Kylo being so helpless, so easily manipulated, so vulnerable made bile rise in his throat. And how many others were taking the same medication. Did it have lasting effects?

****

His hands shook as he unpacked his own phone, trying to insert the SIM card with no small amount of difficulty. Some research was needed.

****

"I promise," he can't even remember exactly why he was taking it in the first place, his anxiety always having been manageable without medication apart from the occasional blunt he smoked at parties. "But why?" Something tells him he's better off not knowing, but his curiosity is stubborn. What the hell had he been taking?

****

Hux seems to be struggling with where to start. His phone comes to life in his hands, and after a moment of working through the initial setup, he opens a browser and types in the name of the pharmaceutical company that makes Levanox. Their homepage pops up in bright comforting colours in a mobile friendly format and the logo sits at the centre of the page.

****

"This logo," he begins, looking uncomfortably at the screen. "This isn't just a logo for a pharmaceutical company." Carefully untucking his shirt from his trousers, Hux leans to the side, pulling the material up to reveal the scar burned into his flesh that matches the logo exactly. "It's a sigil," he leaves the skin exposed for long enough so Kylo can get a good look. "It's the sigil for a very powerful Archdemon, one that I used to serve."

****

"Fuck," just about sums that up. Kylo stares at the brand on Hux's hip turning his attention back to the logo on the phone and finding it to be the same inverted sun. "I have a bad feeling about this."

****

"It's not possible that it's just a coincidence?" Here's hoping.

****

Without thinking Kylo places his hand over the mark, feeling the slight ridge of it through Hux's shirt, quickly pulling back when he realises what he's doing, Hux didn't say he could touch. "Sorry."

****

"I would imagine anything that company is producing is not a miracle cure all." He flinches quite sharply when Kylo places his hand over the mark and then seems to relax.

****

"It's all right." He flicks through the company's website cheking out the various pages. They're relatively new to the med tech industry but their stock has been soaring ever since they introduced their new catch all miracle drug. It was purported to help with depression, anxiety, and a whole slew of other mental illnesses. Kylo had told him it was prescribed to him as an antipsychotic, but looking at the description on their website, it didn't appear to be made for this purpose.

****

"Whatever is in that stuff... it won't be good news. I would like to think it was just coincidence. I really would but it would be dangerous to just brush it off. " He turns to Kylo, searching his eyes. "I don't want you to have to think about it, but please, can you recall any differences in how that drug made you feel? You said you weren't sure it made a difference, did it do anything else?" Hux was already afraid of the answer he might get.

****

It's difficult to point out which of his problems and symptoms might have been caused by the Levanox when everything has sort of been muddled together with the way he's been living. "I guess sometimes I'd get kinda numb, like someone wrapped my head in cotton, that's when I'd see and hear things, it's like I'm not entirely me.

****

"I'd never hallucinated before then, my brain was already fucked, but it wasn't that bad. That and I haven't hallucinated as much lately because I was running out and had to ration the pills for bad days."

****

“Had you taken it when we...met?” Hux paused on the last word. He felt physically ill. If Kylo answered yes, that explained his lack of fear. It meant that what had drawn Hux to him was a cocktail of drugs fucking with his brain’s chemistry.

****

It would also mean that it had saved him. And it explained how Hux was able to give him a little taste of his power. Did that mean there was a lasting effect? He read through the list of active ingredients which may as well have been written in code. He doubted he’d get anything useful from public records anyway.

****

"Yes, I thought I'd lost time when the mould by the fridge had spread and you left those scratches on my back, I've lost a few days here and there before from dissociating." It hasn't happened often, typically in correlation with selling himself, he'd figured it was just his brain's way of coping with the trauma.

****

“Ah,“ is all Hux can manage at that revelation. The drug had made him receptive, pliable, easy to manipulate. He seethed internally for even deigning to think whatever  _ this  _ was had happened without some kind of external influence.

****

Disgusted with himself, he turns away, locking his phone and leaving it on the table.

****

“I’m going to get changed.” He announces stiffly, plucking a few articles of clothing out of the bags that had been for himself. He disappears into the bathroom and not long after the sound of the shower can be heard.

****

Hux sheds his two day old clothes and steps under water that was so hot it should have scalded. His fingers run over the raised tissue above his hip, and then slowly over the network of scars criss-crossing his body.

****

He fights back the urge to scream instead slamming his fist into the tiled wall. The first time the tile gives way, cracking under the force. By the fifth time his knuckles have given way and blood turns the water at his feet pink.

****

Kylo stays seated, stunned at Hux's sudden change in demeanor, he must have done something wrong,  _ again _ . Whenever he thinks he might have found something good he always fucks it up, his scholarship, the therapy, and now Hux. He should have known it was too good to be true, that it wasn't going to last. He supposes he's always known that the demon would eventually see him for what he is, a wreck hardly worth saving.

****

He should apologise at least, tell Hux he can drop him back off where he found him and he won't bother him again. Maybe he should just leave right now, he won't get far like this, but if he's lucky he can convince a cabbie to take him somewhere else in exchange for whatever he wants.

****

On the little table by the door there's a notepad with the hotel's logo printed at the top of the page, picking up the pen next to it Kylo scribbles down  _ I'm sorry _ knowing a simple note isn't really good enough, but Hux didn't seem like he wanted to talk to him anyway. Once in the hallway he makes it as far as the elevator bank before the pain becomes too much, forcing him to take a moment to rest in one of the chairs there, hoping he'll be able to get back up before Hux sees the note.

****

By the time Hux has calmed down enough to be able to face Kylo again with some shred of his dignity intact, the hot water was starting to run out.

****

He gets dressed, this time in grey trousers and a dark navy shirt in stark contrast to the bright copper of his hair. Staring at his own blurred reflection in the fogged up mirror Hux makes a noise of disgust, scrubbing himself dry with one of the soft towels.

****

Dressed and about as ready as he’s going to get Hux leaves the safety of the bathroom. "Kylo?" he calls out when he finds the reception area empty, the television still on in the background. His heart starts to race when he finds the bedroom vacant as well. Would he have gone out?

****

Bags of clothes and food still sit untouched around the sofa and there lies the phone Hux had bought him. His heart sinks even further and he snatches his own up, shoving it into the inner breast pocket of his blazer. Heading for the door he hopes that for some reason Kylo has decided to just step out for a moment, but he can't fool himself, he knows something is wrong.

****

He’s nearly out the door when he spots the note. ‘ _ I'm sorry’ _ he feels sick all over again. This was his fault. Had he not been so wrapped up in his own misery he might have noticed person he was trying to save slip away.

****

Hux is running now, into the elevator, down to the lobby. The trip down takes far too long and he has to fight the urge to take his frustration out on the carved wood panels in the lift. When the door finally opens he steps out into the crowded lobby, eyes darting around frantically. How much time had elapsed? Would he have gotten far?

****

His heart leaps into his throat when he spots a familiar head of black waves moving slowly towards the revolving doors. He starts walking rapidly towards him, fighting the urge to call out his name, when a prickling sensation runs down his spine, making him stop in his tracks.

****

Hux glances off to the right and there in his periphery he sees it, a woman seated on one of the plush sofas, holding a little dog, speaking to a member of the hotel staff. Everything about her is just  _ wrong _ but no one seemed to notice the sickly aura around her.

****

Realising he has stopped dead in the middle of the lobby, Hux carries on, hurrying up behind Kylo and looping an arm around his waist steering him away from the door, back in the direction of the elevators. "Don't make a scene," he murmurs near Kylo's ear. "Please." He tries to get them back and out of sight as quickly as possible, hoping, praying to whatever dark forces were listening that he had not been spotted.

****

Safely inside the elevator going back up, Hux exhales a visible sigh of relief. "Oh thank fuck." He leans heavily against the back of the little compartment before fixing a stare at Kylo. "Why did you leave?"

****

Almost there, he had been thinking, the doors in sight, yellow cabs flitting by, soon Hux won't have to put up with him anymore. He's so close when an arm wraps around his waist, on instinct he freezes up, sure that it's someone who wants to take him away and use him, then Hux's voice whispers in his ear and he relaxes minutely allowing himself to be turned back around. Usually he might have put up a fight, but the tightness and worry in Hux's voice motivates him to keep his mouth shut until they're back in the elevator. Hux's relief is near palpable.

****

"I thought I'd do you a favour, you shouldn't have to put up with me when you clearly don't want to anymore," he hates how weak and winded he sounds, feeling like he's just ran a marathon as opposed to hobbled his way down to the lobby. It's pathetic.

****

"Put up with you?" Hux starts, sputtering and trying very hard to not raise his voice. "Kylo, the only reason you're not screaming your head off and trying to run away from me is because you've spent maker knows how long under the influence of some mystery drug," He is raising his voice now, exasperated, frustrated. "I.." He chokes on his own words but when they do arrive they are full of anger, directed at himself. "I am  _ no better _ than your fucking landlord," he spits, all semblance of grace gone; his normally eloquent patterns of speech giving way to something harsher.

****

"And you're still being influenced by that... that  _ poison _ !" This is the most emotion he has shown thus far, the calm mask of grinning indifference all but destroyed in light of recent events. "Why else would you?" He begins, and only further angers himself when he thinks about how Kylo had kissed him briefly. Was it even Kylo who had wanted that? Or was it whatever had rewritten the way his synapses fired.

****

"It doesn't matter anyway." A firm change of subject as they arrive on their floor and he leads the way back to their room. There are more pressing matters at hand.

****

He had seen another of his kind downstairs. Too close for comfort.

****

"You'd never scare me Hux, you're too beautiful," Kylo mutters to the floor, half hoping Hux won't hear him. It's stupid really, maybe even a side effect of the circumstances, how he's fallen flat on his face for this demon and he's not sure he could get up again even if he wanted to. He'll leave if that is what Hux wants him to do, it won't be easy on him, but he'll do it, walk away from the one good thing he has.

****

"You look more like an angel than you ever did a demon."

****

The mismatched pair make it back to the room with no further incident, Hux shutting the door behind them with a feeling of relief. "I'd like to believe that. I really would." He wants nothing more than to take Kylo's face in his hands, to kiss him, to pull him close. But he can no longer trust the way his companion feels. "But you realise you've been ingesting a drug that seems to be designed to make you...  _ receptive _ to my kind." His face is a mask of pain as he sinks down onto the sofa, pulling up a maps application on his phone and keying in an address.

****

"How can you trust you really feel that way." His words are strained and he can't bring himself to look at Kylo, not needing a reminder of what he could not have.

****

Again, he changes the subject.

****

"I need to find out what is going on. I need to know what is in that drug," he says, stabbing a finger at the television which is playing the same ad again. The advertising budget must have been ludicrous to take up this much air time. "Their manufacturing operations are just outside the city limits." Hux flicks through the details on the little screen in his hand.

****

"I'll go after nightfall."

****

He'd like to think his feelings for Hux are genuine and his alone, the thought that they might not be is scary. "Maybe it made me receptive, but you did the rest, I can't help how I feel, Hux." With that he limps his way into the bedroom, closing the door and contemplating locking it before crawling into bed. Body aching and tired, he tries to find some rest in amongst the worry about what Hux is planning to do, not liking the plan in the slightest. If only he could go with, then again he'd just be a burden like he always is.

****

His traitorous heart gives a little leap at ‘ _ I can't help how I feel’ _ but he makes no move to go after Kylo. Best to let him rest, he still has such a long road of recovery ahead of him. Perhaps if things settled down, if things were resolved, they could look at their connection in more detail. For now though, Hux has work to do.

****

He changes into comfortable jeans, a t-shirt with a hoodie over the top, and a pair of boots. All in black. It was a far cry from the usual stiff attire he wore and he found himself wondering what Kylo would think. Pushing that thought far away, he grabs his phone and the key to the room leaving Kylo to sleep in peace.

****

Rather than going through the lobby, where he can be easily observed, he takes the stairs down and slips out through a service entrance in an alleyway. The glamour he has been maintaining had made him appear human to anyone who cared to look. It took effort, but he re-cast the net, now making himself almost impossible to look at and remember. Anyone who caught sight of him would be unconsciously compelled to look away and upon doing so, would forget they had seen anyone at all.

****

It took far more effort than the simple glamour he normally wore to hide his obvious abnormalities, but it would hold for several hours if he did not overexert himself. Setting off he makes for the nearest subway station, following the route plotted out by the app.

****

-

When Hux had gone from the room, a shadow peels away from the wall and creeps towards the hotel room he had emerged from. It slid beneath the door and shuddered, it's shape growing and elongating into something distinctly female. Light footfalls sounded, approaching the closed bedroom door. It opened silently and the dark figure slips in to stand over the sleeping man.

****

"Oh Huxy.. what  _ have _ you been up to?" Came a voice that was honeyed to the point of being poisonous. The thing that it belonged to was anything but sweet.

****

Kylo had managed to fall into an uneasy sleep at long last, twitching his way through dreams and waking at every little noise, he thinks nothing of it when he's woken yet again, only wishes Hux was here with him. Sleeping next to the demon had been like getting relief for something he didn't know he needed. It's not long before he notices he's not alone, a distinct presence hovering in the air, a similar aura to Hux. Alarm bells go of in his mind. Fuck, shit, shit, shit. That's not Hux. Some other demon is in the room with him. Closing his eyes and hoping it will go away is a childish solution, but he's just a human, he won't stand a chance if the demon wants to hurt him.

****

##  -

****

The building was a squat, unimpressive thing. He supposed it had been designed to look uninteresting, uninteresting did not attract attention. Still, the whole place just screamed trouble. Hux lapped the perimiter fence, gawking at the layers upon layers of nasty traps that had been woven into the fencing. Nothing would appear amiss to the human eye, but if someone were so foolish as to try to cut the fence or climb over, they would die screaming before they made it to the top.

****

He was beginning to wonder if this was remotely wise when approaching headlights made him duck behind the neatly manicured hedgerows near the entrance. A semi had arrived at the distribution entrance and the driver was talking to the guard, showing his identification badge. Hux scrambled to the large vehicle, scaling the back with relative ease. He flattened himself atop the truck and held on tightly as it pulled forward into the compound, getting him safely past the outer wards.

****

He stays put while the driver speaks to the staff at the back entrance, keeping his ears open for anything useful. He was there to pick up a load of finished product and that meant Hux could use him as his way out. Creeping back down the side of the vehicle, he landed on all fours and then stuck to the shadows, slipping into the large industrial building.

****

-

****

A laugh resounded above Kylo and bony fingers curled over the blankets, pulling them away. "Stop pretending to sleep, little one," it murmured, a weight pressing into the mattress beside him. The creature there was terribly deformed and may have been female once, baring a feral, sharp toothed smile at Kylo.

****

The hand grips Kylo by his jaw, turning his head left and then right. "I see why he likes you. Pretty thing," it hisses and drags the human out of his bed, still gripping him by his face. "But you've stopped taking your medicine." Kylo's legs dangle above the floor as the monstrous thing rises to its full height. "We'll soon resolve that." There's that horrible laughter again as it throws Kylo bodily over a shoulder and carries him away.

****

Kylo whimpers when the covers are pulled off, flinches when his face is grabbed and he's forced to look at that  _ thing _ , he screams bloody murder when it throws him over a ridged shoulder and makes for the door. He doesn't expect anyone to come for him, let alone hear him, still he keeps screaming and fighting with what energy he has, a small flicker of hope keeping him going as he's taken further away from the hotel, the demon passing through the crowds like a ghost.

****

No one even looks up.

****

If Hux was an angel he'd pray.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Self harm, rape recovery, hospitals, kidnapping, blood, breaking and entering, implied medical experimentation, implied murder, implied stalking, implied mental manipulation


	4. Summoning is Hella Expensive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warnings at the end.
> 
> Enjoy!

Hux made his way carefully through the factory floor where automated machines pressed pills with their distinct hexagonal logo before sorting them into bottles. He couldn't see anything particularly out of the ordinary so crept through to offices, hoping he could easily get in.

****

The security within the building wasn't as tight as outside, they had apparently relied heavily on the wards built into the fence and for this he was grateful. Taking care to avoid the gaze of any cameras mounted in the ceiling, though he knew he would be ignored, he slipped into an unlocked office and sealed the door behind himself.

****

The records were both paper and electronic it seemed, the company wanting to keep backups of its backups in hard copy - he rifled through a few filing cabinets, not sure what he was looking for exactly. It was about fifteen minutes in when he found the patient records. There was a long list attached to one folder but only twenty or so actual files in the section.

****

Hux flicked through a few,  of the files, glancing at the details of the patients. The records were incredibly detailed, full of photographs, family history, medical information, and notes about receptiveness to the trials.

****

Some of the files were stamped with deceased in red letters which made Hux's skin crawl. He swore he recognised these names from some of the reports on the news. He keeps digging, unsure as to what he's looking for when a familiar face appears in front of him.

****

Kylo.

****

His breath catches in his chest.

****

But the name isn't Kylo. Printed in neat letters at the top of the file is Ben Organa-Solo. Hux frowns. Why was he using a pseudonym?

****

The photograph shows him younger, he looks healthier, he's almost  _ smiling _ . Just how long had they had this file on him? He begins to flip through it, it goes back years, making him go cold. It feels wrong, sifting through such personal information like this.

****

He slams the file closed and tucks it under his hoodie along with a handful of others that are not yet dead. He's already been there too long.

****

Getting out of the building was straightforward enough, he managed to slip out the same way he got in, and soon was back in the relative safety of the hotel.

****

The room was dark when he entered and he turned the lights on in the lounge area, unsurprised to find Kylo wasn't there. The bedroom door was ajar, and when he entered he froze in his tracks. The bed was empty, but the air was wrong here, as if something had crawled into the room and died under the bed. He knows that scent. He knows that presence.

****

"Lamashtu," he cursed her name through gritted teeth. And if she had been here, and Kylo was gone... they had him.

****

\--

****

There were so many dark places deep underground in the city, and the creature carrying Kylo seemed to pass through all of them on the way to her destination. The cell she threw him into was tiny, not even large enough for him to lie down in and there was very little light or warmth. After what felt like hours, a little slot opened at the base of the door and a tray was shoved through with some questionable looking food and a bottle of water.

****

Well at least they meant to keep him alive.

****

For hours he's sat in this cramped cell, exhausted, voice gone, tears long dried up. He's going to die here, why would Hux even bother finding him when his feelings for Kylo clearly aren't the same. He's just a pathetic human that somehow managed to earn a demon's pity. He ought to get an award for that, he thinks sourly.

****

A flinch startles out of him when the slot at the bottom of the door screeches open and a metal tray scrapes on the concrete floor, the smell of food coming with it. He's eaten worse. If he hadn't still been clinging to that little ray of hope that Hux might find him he wouldn't have bothered to eat at all, picking at the stale lump of bread and softening it with the water to make it more agreeable.

****

\--

****

Upon finding that Kylo was missing, Hux immediately began to panic before he managed to calm himself enough to think rationally. If they wanted him dead, he would have found his mutilated body. They had taken him alive.

****

They had taken him alive.

****

There was still hope, however small. Hux clung to this like a thin lifeline and he opened one of the files he had stolen, the one marked Organa-Solo. There had to be something here. He flipped through, his blood cold from the amount of data that had been collected and for how long. They had been observing him for such a long time. There were notes in spidery handwriting indicating he was a suitable host. Hux swallowed thickly.

****

Surely that didn't mean...

****

He flipped to another page and a face stared back at him. An older man with a scraggly beard, wearing the collar of a priest. He recognised the surname from war stories his colleagues had swapped with him. Skywalker. What in the seven hells had he gotten himself embroiled in.

****

Gathering up the paperwork and shoving it into a bag he flicked through his phone, searching for the name and found, conveniently enough, that the man in question was stationed at a nearby church.

****

Steeling him at the thought of entering a holy place, especially after the last time, Hux departed hurrying through the night. Every minute that passes increases the chances he’ll never see Kylo again, and the thought of that leaves him with a hollow ache he can’t soothe no matter how hard he tries.

****

\--

****

The church has been quiet today, only a few confessions and others seeking comfort in the house of God. The city has been feeling off lately, the ritual killings hanging a thick fog over everyone's minds. A collection of lit candles flickering at the altar burn in the memory of those that have been lost while he prays for everyone's safety, kneeling at the steps. In times like these he worries about his unruly nephew more than ever. He hasn't seen Ben since he left college and no amount of searching has provided any clues as to his whereabouts. it's a familiar fear, one he shares with the rest of Ben's family, why they gather to pray for their lost member every sunday over diner when the place set out for Ben remains empty.

****

To think today would be the day he finally learns what became of his nephew he couldn't have foretold, just like he couldn't have expected the tall ginger to burst through the doors of his church with a fear in his eyes so deep it bleeds into the air around him. What strikes him as oddest of all and turns his heart cold is the aura this man carries, one he hasn't felt in a long time.

****

"Why are you here, demon?"

****

Hux had hesitated momentarily, staring up at the looming building. He would not soon forget the pain of his banishment, the way his flesh burned from his bones. The horror on Kylo’s face had almost been worse. He took a deep breath, bursting in through the heavy oak doors as if they weighed nothing. Candles guttered out from the sudden influx of air current, giving him an ominous air about him.

****

Immediately, the man from the photos turned, standing before him, very much real.

****

“I thought you’d have been taller,” Hux frowns down at the priest, quickly doing away with his usual haughty demeanour, he’s here for help after all.

****

“I need your help.” Hux tries to sound genuine and struggles. Instead he hands a thick manilla folder to the man. “Your name was in this folder.” It hadn’t gone into a great detail about the connection between the two. “I don’t know how you know him, but... they have Kyl- Ben,” he corrected, the name sounding alien to his own ears. “I need to find him.” Hux looks desperate, searching the priest’s face. 

****

“Please.”

****

Luke should know better than to listen to a demon, he ought to expel him from these holy grounds without second thought, but it's not every day a demon comes to a priest, near begging for help. He takes the file handed to him, eyes never once leaving the face of this creature of hell, he has no reason to trust him yet. If it hadn't been for the name he's been longing to hear for years falling from his lips Luke would have turned him away.

****

"How do you know Ben?" What on earth has his nephew gotten himself into? It must be bad for a demon to be involved, Ben had always been a sucker for a pretty face. "Who's taken him?"

****

Hux was beyond frustrated. Here he was pleading for help and all this old man could ask was how he knew Kylo? The candles seemed to mirror his frustration, their flames dancing higher with each moment he was made to wait. “It’s a very long story how we know each other. But that’s unimportant,” he grits out, trying to calm himself.

****

“Her name is Lamashtu. The patron of all things deformed.” He’s had dealings with her in the past. Never anything good. “She took him.”

****

“I don’t know how widespread this is but this company,” he says, stabbing a finger to the logo marked Biovitra Pharmaceuticals, “Is involved in all of this.” Hux is exhausted, his face drawn and eyes sunken.

“I have no allies here. I am disgraced. I need help to find where they’ve taken him. I...“ he struggles, “I believe they may be trying to use him as a vessel. He’s been watched for years. Plied with drugs. It’s all there.” He gestures dismissively at the dossier and sinks into a pew.

****

Just being in the church is draining his strength. But he will suffer through it if it means there’s a chance of finding Kylo.

****

Listening carefully Luke opens the dossier and is met with a picture of Ben, the same picture that's on Leia's mantle, the most recent one that exists as far as he's aware, from his junior year at college, taken not long before he vanished. Leafing through it he's met with page after page of info on Ben's psyche and the doses he's been prescribed up until about a year ago, when the info starts thinning out into just the surveillance. A few more pictures are dotted in, one of himself as the demon had said, Leia and Han, and several of a man he can barely recognize as the boy who used to sit on his lap. Leia would weep if she saw her son like this.

****

"A vessel for who?"

****

Hux’s hands clenched and unclenched. Why was there no sense of urgency. Why was this man content to stand there and look sad and ask so many questions while Kylo was.. Kylo was. Hux's face hurt, his eyes were stinging. He wiped wetness away and cleared his throat.

****

"An archdemon. Its name is Snoke. I was… in its thrall. For a time." He absently rubbed his side where he still bore the mark.

****

"Have I adequately answered your questions, priest?" Hux spits, baring his teeth. The candles a roaring inferno around them. "Or do you intend to carry on interrogating me while he is made to  _ suffer _ " This man had no idea of the state Hux had found him in, no idea what Kylo had been through, what Hux had tried to save him from.

****

How badly Hux had failed him.

****

How he hadn’t been here when Kylo needed him most.

****

"If this is true, I'll help, but excuse me if I hesitate to believe a demon wants to help my nephew." It goes against all his beliefs to help this man, but he clearly cares for Ben in some capacity if he's willing to come here for help, to risk his own life for the sake of saving a human. "I haven't seen Ben in over five years, I wouldn't even know to begin. If they want him for a ritual they need peace, I'd suggest looking in the abandoned subway tunnels. A possession takes time if they want the host to survive and keep the body usable for a long time,” he's seen the result of demons forcing their way in carelessly too many times to count. If it's an arch demon they would want Ben to survive.

****

His nephew? Hux looked startled at this. He could see no family resemblance between the two and narrowed his eyes, searching Luke's face for answers.

****

"I'm not asking you to believe me. Frankly I couldn't give a fuck  _ what _ you believe old man," the demon snaps, all pleasantry gone out the window.

****

_ If they want the host to survive _ Hux blanches at this, feeling his stomach drop. They would take their time with him then, preparing him. He leaves Luke with the files, including the ones on other patients who had been in the same program. He doesn't care about them. He only wants Kylo, in his arms again, safe, whole.

****

Out of the church and Hux is straight down the nearest subway station, without a plan, without backup, without weapons. He's not thinking clearly. He has to get to Kylo. No one bats an eye when he jumps off the platform onto the tracks, avoiding the third rail, running into the network of tunnels. He has no idea where to go, where he might find him in the miles of tunnels under the city.  He was cursing his haste after several hours, hopelessly lost, he wished he had the forethought to ask for more detail.

****

It's an accident how he finds the entrance. While avoiding a passing train by a slim margin, he presses himself up against a wall and a shock goes through him at the contact as if he'd stepped on the wrong rail.

****

Yanking his hand away from the offending chalked out ward, he sucks on his burned fingers, wincing. This was a good sign. He follows the markings, trying to work out what they're protecting. If he had been a lesser demon the initial touch would have fried him on contact.

****

There it was, in the dark, amongst cracked brick and cobwebs he found a gap that led to a set of stairs. Hux carefully descended into the dark. He swore he could hear sobbing emanating from below.

****

In his cell Kylo has lost track of time, the hours blurring together in the darkness as he listens to demons come and go. When the door opens it's been long enough for the bread to settle in his stomach like a lump of lead and he's been forced to piss in the corner to avoid the humiliation of wetting himself. The same demon from before grips his arm, claws digging into the skin, and hauls him out into the corridor. Above them a train thunders by, dust raining from the ceiling as he's pulled along his legs barely keeping up, stumbling on the rough ground.

****

They end in a big room, a crossroads of tunnels that houses a makeshift altar made from stacked cinder blocks and a piece of plywood. This isn't going to end well for him.

****

Instead of just tying him to the altar as he expected he's shoved to the side, where a masked figure stands holding a bucket and another takes him from the demon, stripping him off his clothes. The air down here is frigid, burning against his injuries leaving him shivering and scared as the deformed demon regards him. A sudden shock of cold water nearly brings him to his knees when the bucket is dumped over his head. Bucket exchanged for a sponge the person roughly rubs him down, showing no care when he whimpers from the pain and a few spots of blood well to the surface, dripping down his chest and legs. Neither do they let up when he starts sobbing, scrubbing him until his skin is red and raw.

****

Next they tie him down to the altar, rough rope digging into his already sore skin, as more people begin to file into the room, surrounding him in a circle of candles and black robes.

****

Hux follows the sound of whimpering sobs and soon can hear chanting as well. He's running in the dark now, completely without a plan, but desperate to find Kylo.

****

\--

****

With rough hewn rope securing his fragile body to the altar, those gathered press in close, whispering in a tongue foreign to Kylo's ears, their faces hidden from view, obscured by shadow and black cloth.

****

The vile thing that dragged him here seems to be presiding over the rites and stands in front of him, directing the chanting figures.

****

As one, they withdraw blades from their robes, their whispered voices reaching a fever pitch. On the last word they slit their own throats, silencing themselves and stumbling forward towards their chosen vessel. Arterial blood drenches Kylo's pale skin in stark contrast, burning in comparison to the aching cold of the chamber.

****

The candles go out, plunging them into darkness and Kylo can feel a presence worming its way into his mind, slick and sickening like so much grease. It's forceful and ruthless, intent on pushing his own consciousness down.

****

\--

****

Hux stumbles into the room as the stench of blood fills his senses.  _ No no no nononono _ He's screaming in his head. Please let him still be alive, please.

****

He runs towards Kylo's prone form, surrounded by the dead, his skin soaked in their blood.

****

Oblivious to his surroundings, only focused on Kylo, he chokes when a pair of skeletal hands wrap around his throat, pulling him back.

****

Kylo can do nothing but cry as the malevolent presence forces its way in. It hurts in a creeping way, as if a knife was being slowly pushed into into his brain, poison spreading from the blade to force him further into the darkness of his own mind, making room for something else. He cries and thrashes as much as he can, while the poison spreads through his veins, lighting him on fire. It's pointless to fight back.

****

Soon he feels like a passenger in his own body, restricted by thick chains cold as ice.

****

"Ben Solo," A gravelly voice reverberates in his skull, "mine at last."

****

"Kylo!" Hux chokes out as he's wrenched backwards, his body slammed into the floor, the breath forced from his lungs.

****

"Oh Hux, always getting involved where you're  _ not wanted _ " The voice belonged to the thing currently standing on his chest. "And how weak you've become! All that time spent as a piece of jewellery really did you no favours, did it." Hux felt the pressure increase on his chest until something cracked beneath his skin, making him cry out in agony.

****

This only served to delight the abomination taunting him. She picked him up by the throat like a ragdoll and his hands wrapped around the offending limb, struggling to free himself.

****

"Now then, let’s get this over with shall we?" Suddenly Hux was facing Kylo who was now sitting up. There was something wrong with his eyes.

****

"Kill him," she demands, and Hux realises that she’s speaking to the thing that is in Kylo. He thrashes, feet dangling above the floor.

****

"Kill him and sever their connection."

****

A surge of delight comes from the thing inhabiting him, cruel laughter echoing in his skull. The sound is coming from him, the realisation makes him feel wretched, that's not him, it's his voice, but it's all wrong, layered with another. Moving against his will, his body sits up, pain a distant memory. Then Hux is there, held aloft by the thing that had brought him, offered up for slaughter.

****

_ ‘Kill him’ _ the words awaken something in him, a strength he didn't know he had, renewing his will to fight. No one gets to hurt Hux and this body is his and his alone. Fighting against it is like slogging through waist deep mud, but he can already feel the entity's attention diverting from Hux to him, the resistance grows. He keeps pushing against the flood of memories he's being fed, the worst times of his life plucked, warped, and presented on a flood of fear meant to break him.

****

With great effort awareness is starting to return to him, as he forces the demon back, allowing himself to grow in his own body until the pressure is immense. His skull feeling like it might split.

****

Hux struggles against Lamashtu holding him as she crushes his neck, waiting patiently for Kylo or rather the entity that had taken possession of Kylo to dispatch him.

****

A little spark of hope blooms in Hux's eyes as he watches the internal struggle unfold. He's not giving in, Kylo is fighting the archdemon's influence. Hux laughs, a hoarse sound thanks to the pressure on his trachea.

****

Lamashtu, the mother of abominations joins him in his laughter, though hers resounded shrilly in the dark chamber.

****

"Look at how it struggles, Armitage!" she shrieks with delight, knowing that there's no way Kylo can overcome the overwhelming darkness that is Snoke's influence.  It's sickening, the way his name sounds when she speaks it, the ruin that is her mouth should not be able to produce any sound, and yet there it is.

****

"In that case, allow me, my Lord." And Hux hears a terrible scream and feels warmth spreading down the side of his leg. After a moment he realises the screaming is coming from his own mouth, and the warmth is his blood pouring out from the monstrous bite she has taken out of his side.

****

At the blood curdling sound of Hux's scream a fierce protectiveness rises in him and he forces the thing in his body to point it's malevolence at the demon holding Hux. The war over his body isn't over yet, but his love for Hux keeps him inching towards victory, the demon in him is strong, he can tell, but it's yet to draw blood and gain all its strength. It's strange to reach for her, still feeling like he's watching from the outside.

****

Hux writhes in agony as uneven teeth tear through his flesh, devouring him piece by piece. He watches as Kylo reaches for one of the arms holding him in a vice-like grip, moving as if in a dream.

****

Realising that Kylo is approaching, Lamashtu offers Hux up again, yanking his head back to offer his undamaged throat.

****

“Please my Lord.” She says through a mouthful of Hux’s blood, assuming Kylo has lost the war within. Hux is convinced as well, and tears burn his eyes at the loss of the man he had come to love. How poetic that he should die by his hand.

****

With great effort Kylo forces himself to stand taking the few steps required to get within reach while claws tear at his very soul in an attempt to push him back down. "Don't touch him, you bitch," he chokes out past the lump in his throat, digging his fingers into her neck with unnatural strength.

****

The abomination shrieks as Kylo’s fingers tear into her throat, doing far more damage than he should be able to. She throws Hux like a rag doll, he lands unmoving near the altar. Skeletal fingers claw at Kylo’s hand, attempting to pry him off of her.

****

Kylo screams as her claws tear open his skin, the pain a sharp reminder that this is his body, there's no room here for anyone else. With that in mind he takes more from the demon inside him, leeching him dry and pushing it into every corner of his body, crushing her neck with a wet snap, twisting it at a sickly angle just to be sure that it's finally done. She falls limp, Kylo doesn't trust it. Forcing his body to comply he drags one of the cinder blocks from its place in the altar, wheezing with every step as he lifts it above the demon's head and lets go.

****

"Hux!" his voice comes out raspy and dry, but it's his own. Dropping to his knees he crawls to where his demon is laid out, "no, no, no," he whimpers, hands uselessly trying to keep more blood from oozing out of the hole in Hux's side.

****

"Please come back." Fresh tears drip onto Hux's skin, stained pink with the blood covering his face, "Please."

****

"I love you."

****

“Kylo...” the demon’s voice is thin and strained. He can feel the press of hands against his side making him bite back a cry of pain. His eyes are glazed, the words not fully registering for several minutes. A dazed, almost dreamy look flickers across his face realisation sinks in. “You.. you love me?” He’s trying to move now, with great difficulty. Though his constitution was far greater than a human and he technically did not age, like the smashed in body beside them, death was very much a real threat.

****

A hand presses to Kylo’s bloodied face, Hux is so tired, he can barely make out his human’s features, eyes refusing to focus. “I think I might... I don’t know if I..” He’s struggling to find the words and is still bleeding freely despite the pressure Kylo’s large hands are applying. The injury needs to be bound. The pair of them need to get out of there.

****

"No, don't you dare, I won't let you," Kylo stutters out between sobs, putting as much conviction into his voice as he can. Looking around he grabs the nearest piece of cloth, tearing apart the hem of the robe that's avoided most of the blood, balling up some, pressing it to the wound and trying it in place with another strip, hoping and praying that it'll hold until he can get help. Grabbing another robe he wraps it around his waist hoping to retain some modesty before bodily lifting Hux into his arms.

****

Hux's brow furrows in confusion, had Kylo misunderstood his attempt to put into words how he felt? Before he could elaborate he was biting back a cry as pressure was applied to the injury again, torn fabric crudely and tightly tied around his torso. He feels himself lifted and again this elicits another groan, spots dancing across his eyes.

****

Every step is like walking on jagged rocks, pain lancing through Kylo’s body, but he has to do this, if he doesn't they'll both die down here. He remembers the way they came, if he can just find a platform in use someone can call an ambulance. He has to make it that far, there's no other option.

****

"I can... I can walk. Please. " He knows Kylo is weak too, doesn't want to cause him any more anguish. But before he knows it they are emerging into a tunnel with better lighting and there are people. There is shouting and a flurry of movement and many pairs of arms pull them both onto cold, dirty tile.

****

Hux is laying on his back, gasping, blood oozing onto the floor, and Kylo looks like the culprit which probably isn't helping matters. Someone shouts that they are phoning the police, another calls an ambulance, people are swarming around them now, trying to separate them, and Hux is reaching out desperately for Kylo.

****

He's so exhausted the world is starting to blur in front of his eyes by the time they make it to the platform and everything explodes into a flurry of activity. He clings to Hux tightly while hands try to pull them apart, refusing to let go, not now, not when they might not make it out of here. One more person reaches for him and he's had enough, imagining he could just make them leave him and Hux alone until actual help gets here. They do. One by one they stop trying to separate them, allowing Kylo to close the distance and cling to Hux's side, putting him so that his wound won't be in contact with the filthy ground.

****

A crowd stands around them in a circle, as if an invisible force field is cutting them off from the rest of the chaos. Hux leans into Kylo, eyes heavy, unsure he's seen what's just happened correctly. Had that been his doing?

****

He's grateful for the closeness, his hand grasping Kylo's, his mind wavering on the knife-edge of unconsciousness. Paramedics arrive, trying to push through the crowd to assess both of the injured men.

****

A ripple goes through the gathered people, something isn't right about the ginger, murmurs are spreading, sounding concerned. Hux's glamour is fading as he loses his grip on this world. They will see him for what he is.

****

"You're so beautiful like this," is the last thing Kylo remembers saying before he slips under, a thick blanket of darkness spreading over him as the paramedics rush over closely followed by police who maintain the perimeter Kylo has set.

****

\--

****

When Hux wakes up, he's immediately aware of a terrible pain in his side and goes to reach for it but finds himself unable. He opens his eyes, slowly at first, to adjust to the light.

****

The room blurs into focus, revealing he is... ah, he is in a hospital. He turns his head to the side and finds a bank of machinery monitoring his heart and other lifesigns, and then looks down to where his wrist is secured to the railing at the side of the bed. with a belted, padded restraint.

****

Well, that’s not a good development. Head rolling in the other direction rewards him with a much better sight; Kylo in the adjacent bed, eyes closed, but still very much alive. And then down to find his other wrist also restrained.

****

Kylo doesn’t appear to be in the same bonds and the blood has been cleaned from his skin, so he could only assume they thought himself a threat. "Kylo..." his voice is hoarse, his throat feeling like it’s full of cotton as he calls out to his sleeping companion.

****

Waking up is a sluggish experience, drawn out by the buzz in his head and the ache covering the rest of him. It takes him a moment to register his name being called and he forces his lead lined eyes open only to be assaulted by bright lights and the clinical smell of a hospital. There's his name again, raspy and dry, but he'd know that accent anywhere.

****

"Hux?" he mutters coaxing his body to stand and walk the few paces to where the demon is strapped to his bed. His fingers are clumsy as he fumbles open the restraints. With Hux's arms free Kylo crawls onto the sliver of space next to him on the bed, it's a tight fit, but he's past caring, just wanting to be close to his demon again. It's not long before he falls back asleep curled up against Hux's uninjured side.

****

Once he's free of his restraints, Hux carefully shifts himself to the side, allowing a little more space for Kylo to crawl in beside him. His arm circles around his shoulders as it had so many times before, and he presses a soft kiss into waves of dark hair. It’s not long before his breathing evens out and sleep takes him. Hux runs his fingers through Kylo’s long hair, watching him sleep.

****

There’s movement outside the room, it appears to be the same police officers who interviewed him previously, along with nurses and another familiar face, the priest who had helped him - Kylo's uncle? Hux didn't care, he was far too exhausted to care. His side throbbed and he curled in protectively around Kylo, letting his eyes slip closed and sleep take him. He never wanted to move from this spot.

****

\--

****

When the police officer had come walking into his church with a face serious as carved rock Luke immediately thought the demon hadn't made it in time, or maybe not been truthful at all. When they tell him Ben is alive and in hospital a heavy burden on his soul lightens. Han and Leia have already been informed and is on their way into the city, Luke thanks the Lord and leaves with the officers, Ben is going to need his family now more than ever.

****

He's been to this hospital before, praying with patients, holding sermons, and reading last rites. Today he's not here for any of those things. With his bible clutched close to his chest and his rosary in hand he follows the officers through the halls until they reach a guarded room where two nurses are waiting alongside the stationed officer.

****

They update him on what's happened, on the ritual scene found in an abandoned subway tunnel and how Ben had appeared, soaked in blood, carrying a man they couldn't identify. The people gathered exchange looks. The demon made it too then.

****

The officers look uncomfortably at the priest, as if having him there, clutching a rosary lends credence to the statements witnesses in the subway gave. One moment Kylo was there, soaked in blood laying next to a gravely wounded man, and then the next, the redhead  _ changed _ and wasn't human.

****

The accounts were all slightly different, some described his hair made of fire and his skin like ash, the most terrifying thing they had ever seen. Others said he was achingly beautiful, cut from alabaster and flecked with copper, his hands dipped in ink and his outline aflame.

****

They had dragged them apart and restrained the redhead in the ambulance, but upon arrival there were two injured men and no entity to be found despite what the paramedics kept insisting on.

****

The nurses had restrained the redhead anyway just to be safe, but the entity never returned, and in the hospital room now, the two men shared the same bed. The dark haired one curled up possessively on the unidentified man's chest.

****

"You can see him now." The nurse opened the door, allowing Luke entry into the room. The two police officers stayed by the door, watching warily.

****

Hux's eyes slowly opened to slits at the intrusion and he peered up at the priest as he entered the room. His arm squeezed Kylo tighter as if to keep him from being taken away.

****

"Ben," the name slips out on a breath of shock, it's worse than in the pictures, his poor nephew near skeletal where he's asleep on the demon's chest. It's so much worse than he ever could have imagined. How could they have let this happen? They should have tried harder to find him. Maybe if they'd looked one more time, asked a few more questions this could have been avoided.

****

"Thank you," it hurts him to say it, to thank this abomination, but if it hadn't been for him Ben would be dead or worse.

****

Hux managed a dry rattle of a laugh, finding the whole situation absurd. He strokes his fingers through Kylo's hair again. "Well that's a surprise," he begins, trying to be quiet so Kylo can get the sleep he clearly needs. "I thought you'd be blaming me, if anything." Falimg eyes narrow at the rosary Luke is clutching as if it were a weapon. He was vulnerable in his weakened state and the last thing he wanted was for Kylo to be taken away from him again. 

****

Never again.

****

"Somehow I doubt he wants to see you." Hux had never heard Kylo say much about his family, but surely if they had truly loved and cared for him he would not have been in the state he was in when Hux happened upon him.

****

"No, I don't imagine he would, last time he saw me he burned my church down," Luke chuckles, at the time it had been a tragedy, now that it's more of a distant memory he can find some fondness in the rebel Ben used to be. "He was always troubled so it doesn't really come as a surprise that he'd fall in with your kind."

****

Luke steps closer to the bed tucking his rosary into a pocket as a sign of peace, slowly reaching out to put his fingers against Ben's wrist just to confirm he is indeed alive and breathing and not just an illusion. Despite the myriad of injuries he can spot Ben looks at peace, like he's exactly where he wants to be.

****

Hux manages a grin at the thought of Kylo burning a church to the ground. Well, he was certainly full of surprises. At the comment about falling in with his kind though, his smile vanishes and he flinches when Luke touches Kylo’s wrist.

****

“I assure you I am not laying here with a corpse,” he snaps, offended that Luke would even need to check for a pulse. The priest had served his purpose, Kylo was safe, and Hux wanted him out of the room. “Unless there’s anything else you’d like to chat about, I think we can part ways now,” voice turning to ice he stares at the door, willing him to leave.

****

Luke sours at the demon's attitude, "Maybe you don't understand, but I've been searching for my nephew for five years, forgive me if I want to make sure he's alive. None of my previous run ins with demons have exactly endeared you to me." Ben might trust this one, but Luke won't be swayed that easy.

****

"What do you want with him?" He can feel the demon's persuasion pressing on his mind, but he resists. He's strong this one.

****

"He was right around the corner, living in squalor. Pardon me if I find your methods of  _ 'searching _ ' to be lacking." Hux spits back, sneering at the priest. Was he supposed to feel some sort of sympathy? Kylo was lucky to be alive, and if Hux had not had a chance meeting with him.. He scowls thinking about what his landlord put him through, what the world put him through.

****

"It's none of your business what I want with him." The room was starting to get uncomfortably warm and the wound on Hux's side ached horribly, his arm tight around Kylo. He had decided he would never allow his so called family to take him back. Not after they had all but abandoned him.

****

"But I can guarantee you, he won't be going back with you or the rest of his wretched family. He's  _ mine _ ."

****

"Please stop arguing." The increase in temperature and rising volume had been enough to wake Kylo, "Hux is right."

****

Hux flinches, looking apologetically at Kylo when he stirs, awoken by their raised voices and his own increased body temperature, his frustration obvious.

****

"Oh, Ben," Luke sighs, struggling not to reach out again, "What have you gotten yourself into?" If only he can stall long enough for Han and Leia to get here maybe there's a chance they could convince him to come home.

****

"That's not my name." That pity is so grating, he never wanted pity, not then not now. "I want you to leave." He can't even make himself look at Luke, it's a visage he's run away from all too many times. There's a reason he stopped going to the shelters unless as a last resort. Too many close calls with Luke and other members of his parish, not to mention the risk of word reaching him if he went too often.

****

"Fine, but I'm not going home," he's not ready to give in that easy, not when they've finally found him.

****

"Go on then. Get out," Hux grits out, glowering at Luke, still holding onto Kylo for dear life.

****

When the priest leaves the room, closing the door behind him, he turns to to the man in his arms and winces. "I’m sorry, I didn't mean to wake you... I just." He had been incensed. As far as he could see, Kylo had been left for dead. How dare Luke come sauntering in and expect him to just leap back into his family's arms. It made him so angry that they expected so much and had given so little.

****

Softer now he asks, "How are you feeling?" and strokes the hair away from Kylo’s forehead, worried about the state of his mind after his ordeal.

****

"Like someone tried to sacrifice me to the devil by putting me underneath a subway train," he groans into Hux's shoulder. "How about you?" The image of Hux bleeding out on the dirty ground is forever branded into his memory.

****

"Like something took a bite out of me," he managed, glancing down at the bandages criss-crossing his torso. The bleeding had long stopped at least, and while he healed quickly, it would still take time for everything to close up properly and there would be serious scarring.

****

Still, he was alive, relatively intact, and Kylo was safe.

****

"Is it.. is he still there?" Hux asked nervously, pressing a finger to Kylo's forehead to make his point.

****

"I don't know," if he is Kylo can no longer feel him, "My memory is a little spotty past being tied down." The rope burn around his wrists and ankles is enough to tell him he stayed there a while and struggled. “First thing I remember past that is rage and-" he hesitates for a moment before finishing, "love."

****

"Then I was waking up and you were dying," a heart stopping sensation he hopes he won't ever feel again.

****

"I was certain you... he... it…  was going to kill me," Hux says softly, looking down at the waves of black hair tickling his chest. His fingers gently stroked against the rope burns on his wrist. "You fought him off..." Hux sounded amazed, he hadn't thought it possible. There was more to this fragile human than he had ever expected.

****

"You told me you loved me," he murmurs into Kylo's hair, his breath warm against his scalp, wondering if it had been just the heat of the moment that had spurred him to such words. Was Hux even something worthy of love? He wasn't so sure.

****

Kylo couldn't fight back the blush that rises no matter how hard he tries so he just turns his face into Hux's armpit and prays the demon doesn't notice. "I do." It might be too soon for such a declaration, but after what they've been through it would be difficult not to fall in love. Not to mention he's sure he'd feel the same no matter how they first came to meet, cursed bracelet or no.

****

"I do love you," he's well aware he might sound a little delirious delivering such affection to a demon though it doesn't change how he feels, "I also think I might need to sleep for a week."

****

It's not hard to spot the blush rising into Kylo’s face; he would've had to been blind to miss it.  The way they were squeezed into the bed was incredibly awkward and Hux had to carefully shift himself downward to bring them to the same level.

****

"I think.. " He looked hesitant, and felt an uncomfortable sensation in his chest, as if something were trying to escape. "I love you as well." It felt so foreign to utter those words, to admit to what he had known when he saw Kylo reaching for him in that horrible chamber.

****

"I just... I never thought you could." He thought Kylo too damaged, too far gone to be able to care for something like him, considering what he was, what he represented. And it was  _ his kind _ as Luke had put it, that had nearly been Kylo's undoing.

****

A surprised burst of laughter escapes him when Hux returns the sentiment and he knows for a fact he's probably lost it. He hasn't felt this happy and unburdened since before he got on his knees for his first trick. Hux loves him. "I didn't think I could either, then you came along because I went drunk shopping on ebay with a stranger." Their story really is absurd now that he thinks about it. 

****

But here they are, surviving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ritual suicide, blood, demonic sacrifice, gore, hospitals, demonic possession, religious themes, mental manipulation
> 
> Please let me know if I missed anything


	5. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we go, a little happy ending for our boys. If you've gotten this far, thank you for surviving all the pain and angst that led up to this.
> 
> Enjoy!

Hux sighed, pacing restlessly, growing more agitated by the minute. He kept checking his watch, wary of the time, and then finally it happened.

 

"H.. hugs?" a voice said a close approximation of his name and his bright expression turned sour almost instantly. Snatching the pair of white paper cups from the counter, and filling his pockets with far more packets of sugar than necessary, he set off from the little coffee shop into the chilly winter sun.

 

The past month had gone so quickly, and it was strange to think about things being any different to what they were now. A few blocks and he turned a sharp left, ducking into a building and ascending several flights of stairs in rapid succession. He reaches a door painted bright red, unlike the others in the hall which were all white, why his was red, he had no idea. Someone's idea of a joke maybe. Nudging the keys into the lock while juggling everything he was carrying, Hux managed to make his way into the apartment.

 

A couple of weeks after they were released from the hospital, Hux had finally gotten around to finding himself a place in the city. It had been as easy as planting a few suggestions about who he was and no he didn't need references and yes cash was fine for a deposit- and the keys were his.

 

There wasn't a great deal of furniture, the place had come with a half decent corner sofa and he had gone out and spent a ridiculous amount on a bed. Said bed being where he spotted a blot of inky black hair still nestled amongst white pillows.

 

"Kylo..." He leaned down to murmur in the sleeping man's ear and gave him a little nudge.

 

He set a cup of coffee down on the bedside cabinet - Hugs scrawled on the white paperboard in big black letters. Hux rolled his eyes at that and sat on the edge of the bed, nursing his own, far less sweet drink.

 

Kylo groans pathetically at being woken up, this bed is too comfortable for its own good with all it's pillows and down comforter. Hux has been spoiling him rotten since they were finally set free from the confines of the hospital and unwanted visitations from Kylo's family. He can't honestly say he minds. It's the smell of caramel mocha that gains his interest first, the sweetness of it almost cloying. "It's perfect, thank you," even knowing it's still too warm Kylo takes a sip that stings just a little on his tongue.

 

Hauling himself upright he takes another sip to coax his body into waking up faster. "I don't know what I'd do without you," he praises his cup, "Both of you." Smiling softly he leans in for a coffee flavoured kiss.

 

They've both come so far this last month, they still have a long way to go, but now they're safe and getting better. Kylo doesn't think he'll ever forget the first time he looked in the mirror and was happy with what he saw in over four years, he'd cried when he realised and Hux had been there with him like always, helping him see his own worth.

 

Never in his life could he have imagined that this was where he’d end up, that when he’d wake from nightmares, shaking and crying, Hux would be right there to hold him and vice versa. After all they’ve been through they’ve become near inseparable, a bond forged so strong it will tie them together for all eternity

 


End file.
